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A Reader of Fictions: Cover Snark (33)

A Reader of Fictions

Book Reviews for Just About Every Kind of Book

Friday, November 23, 2012

Cover Snark (33)

Welcome to the post-Thanksgiving edition of Cover Snark, where the people are judgmental are the covers quiver with fear.  For those who celebrate Thanksgiving, hope you had a marvelous holiday. I certainly did, as I got to spend the day with my parents and best friends. Also, many bottles of wine and far too much food. Because of the holiday, Cover Snark was delayed, but it will be back on Thursday as usual next week. Give me some comment love to let me know which covers you like best or hate most!

Pro tip: The easiest way to comment on such a long post is to open the post in two windows (really easy if you use Google Reader). Comment in one and scroll the covers in the other. That's actually how I comment on other people's reviews too. I can't remember all my comments by the time I get to the box!

1. The Dreaming Field - Ron Savage
Thoughts: Ghost face with moon eye. Why is this happening? I will admit the cover is somewhat eye-catching to me, because I love the colors, I don't like what I find when I look closer. The title font is much too run together.

2. Heart of Iron (London Steampunk #2) - Bec McMaster 
 Thoughts: He's trying to go in for a kiss and she's too busy making duck faces at the camera to pay him any attention. Poor Burly McSteampunk. He will surely drown his sorrows into many beers tonight. I do love the parasol, but I think it would be way cooler if there was a servant holding it over her, like in those Jack Vettriano paintings. Much loathing to the tag line, as well: "There's nothing more dangerous than falling love." Stupid and trite. Wonderful.

3. Unclaimed - Sara Humphreys
Thoughts: These muscles can be yours for an all-time low price of 199.95 with Amoveo, the revolutionary new workout system guaranteed to turn your from flabby to fabby in just three short months. Amoveo's creator, Sara Humphrey's, based her exercises on the fitness of wolves, nature's most majestic and powerful animals. Act fast: only 300 copies left unclaimed!

4. Cold Copper (Age of Steam #3) - Devon Monk
 Thoughts: Successfully steampunk, except that this dude looks a little bit too much like Cosmo Kramer for me to take him entirely seriously.

5. The Ghost of Josiah Grimshaw - Suzy Turner 
Thoughts: One thing I really hate about covers? When part of the cover looks like a photo and part looks illustrated. The one girl looks really poorly drawn and the other looks much more realistic. Make them both look stupid and at least be consistent. Ugh. Also, I really want to give the girl in the corset some ice cream. She is dangerously skinny.

6. The Family Trap - Joanne Phillips
Thoughts: Honestly, I don't give a damn about this cover for the most part, BUT I love that it's called The Family Trap and it's about marriage. The part of me that's horrified by how many of my friends are getting marries is clapping. This cover comes Admiral Ackbar-approved.

7. A Fatal Likeness - Lynn Shepherd
 Thoughts: Oooh, pretty. That is one sassy feather headdress she's wearing. Goodness but I'm week to pretty historical dress covers. I also really like the font treatment.

 8. A Dance with Darkness (Angelfire #0.5) - Courtney Allison Moulton
Thoughts: Publishers really don't try for these ebook covers, do they?

9. Autumn Storm (Witchling Trilog #2) - Lizzy Ford
Thoughts: Whenever anyone smiles like that, with just two teeth showing, it makes me think of dolls, which always seem to be smiling that way. Anonymous girl blinded by leaves + cheesy font treatment + strange bright light behind the title = good try, but no.

10. Forever My Girl (The Beaumont #1) - Heidi McLaughlin
 Thoughts: He's going to write so many songs about how his girl left him and then got run over by a train. You know what would be cool? If it was based on this song.

11. To Save Myself - Krystal Marlein
Thoughts: Emo checklist: excessive eye makeup (check), tears (makeup), smudged makeup due to crying (check. bonus points for clownish results), black and purple font (check), talking about death (check - "To learn to live, first I had to die."), dark clothing (oops).

12. Twice Tempted (Night Prince #2) - Jeaniene Frost
Thoughts: Seriously, is there some rule that cover models on romance novels with "tempted" or "temptation" in the title have to be really unfortunate-looking? Also, do women who read romance novels have a thing for dudes with long hair? There's an insane proportion of long-haired dudes. Romance novel fans, your thoughts? Is long hair hot or do you wish the cover models would get haircuts? Another musing: do authors get paid to blurb books? Charlaine Harris' name is on a blurb for at least one book in every Cover Snark post, I swear.

13. Darkness Bred (Chimney Rock #2) - Stella Cameron
Thoughts: Oh no, guys. Charlaine Harris didn't blurb this one. Note that there's another long-haired man, who comes with bonus creepy eyes. Am I supposed to find this appealing? "After dark, desire rules..." Apparently they don't believe in Afternoon Delight in this world.

14. Enthralled - Lora Leigh, Alyssa Day, Meljean Brook, & Lucy Monroe
Thoughts: He does, in fact, seem to be quite enthralled by his head. Probably all of the black smudging on his hands and arms were his acting notes, but they got all smudged when they oiled him up, so now he's trying desperately to make out what he's supposed to be doing. Why is that wolf IN the moon? Why does Lora Leigh get to have her name HUGE on the cover?

15. Ride 'em Hard - Paige Tyler
Thoughts: BAHAHA, The best part of this is that the series is apparently titled "Buckle Bunnies." I don't have any good ideas as to why. Suggestions in the comments?

16. Fall of Night (The Morganville Vampires #14) - Rachel Caine
Thoughts: Cover model, why so angry?

17. Christmas Kisses - H.M. Ward
Thoughts: I cannot help but be skeptical of authors who post at a pace I can only describe as James Patterson-esque. H.M. Ward has been self-publishing since 2011 and appears to have around 20 books already. Anyway, apparently Christmas Kisses are butterfly kisses, so that your lips don't freeze together in the cold; being literally fused together at the mouth is less hot. However, considering that it's so cold, the fact that they're undressed seems like an unfortunate thing. Also, what's up with her hair?

18. Beautiful Creatures: The Graphic Novel (Caster Chronicles) - Kami Garcia & Margaret Stohl
Thoughts: Another awful looking graphic novel adaptation. Awesome. Admittedly, this does look a bit better done than most, but I would be really surprised to find out this was good.

19. Kill City Blues (Sandman Slim #5) - Richard Kadrey 
Thoughts: Pretty colors! Fun fact: I love when colors that should clash look perfect together as with that orange font on the greeny-blue background. I'm not a huge fan of Mr. Shadow Man, but otherwise this is a win for me.

20. Emerald Green (The Ruby Red Trilogy #3) - Kerstin Gier
Thoughts: PRETTY DRESSES. Alright, that might be the real reason I love this, but, to be fair, the background scene is really crazy cool as well.

21. Facade (The Games Series #2) - Nyrae Dawn
Thoughts: Beneath this facade of happy coupledom, they actually loathe one another. He's actually trying to rip her hair out by the roots and whispering sweer murderous nothings, and she's about to knee him in the gonads.

22. Some Quiet Place - Kelsey Sutton
Thoughts: Incredibly creepy and gorgeous. Dress made of leaves on a girl without arms or legs. I have NO idea why this is happening, but this just hopped to the top of my WANT list.

23. Avow (The Archers of Avalon #3) - Chelsea Fine
Thoughts: Meet Katniss' skinnier, poutier cousin.

24. Heart of Glass (Cross My Heart #2) - Sasha Gould
Thoughts: You know what I love? Fans. You know what I don't love? Generic taglines.

25. And With Madness Comes the Light (Experiment in Terror #6.5)- Karina Halle
Thoughts: This really doesn't fit with the other covers I've seen for this series. Is this an effort to attract romance readers? I do really like that the series info kind of looks like the brand on his underwear. Seriously, though, what the fuck is up with the fleur de lis?

26. Exhale - Jennifer Snyder
Thoughts: HAIR. Who thought that was a good idea? I can't see anything else.

27. Genesis Queen - Gracen Miller
Thoughts: *snorts* The road to cover hell is paved with terrible fonts, drugged women, and sweaty shirtless men with tattoos.

28. Rebel Bride - Morgan K. Wyatt
Thoughts: Is the horse the bride? Is the girl a zombie determined to keep them apart? Surely, this must be the case.

29. The Zigzag Effect - Lili Wilkinson
Thoughts: This does not look like a holiday book. What this does look like is a hot mess. Even that rabbit knows.

30. Rocky Mountain Rebel - Vivian Arend
Thoughts: Six Pack Ranch. See-through shirt. Denim shirt. With cutoff sleeves. Seriously, romance covers, you will kill me one day; I will laugh myself to death someday when I'm old. Honestly, though, I would wear that lace shirt.

31. Weird Detectives: Recent Investigations - Paula Guran, ed.
Thoughts: I'm actually loving this. The font just pops and I love when covers embrace their silliness and are humorous on purpose. Is that girl's hair orange and yellow like the font or am I seeing things?

32. The Last Academy - Anne Applegate
Thoughts: Is this another book about a paranormal prep school? This cover bores me. They look like zombies. They better be zombies. To my knowledge, zombie prep school hasn't been done yet.

33. Boy Nobody (Boy Nobody #1) - Allen Zadoff
Thoughts: Oooh, another awesome titles treatment. Holla. The tagline looks nice, but doesn't really tell me anything I can't guess from the cover itself. Anyway, I love the style of this cover and added the book to my tbr. I'm also intrigued because this author has done contemporaries so far as far as I know.

34. The Sun Dwellers (The Dwellers #3) - David Estes
Thoughts: Admittedly, this isn't an excellent cover. I seriously don't know what's up with the image. However, I do think the covers for this series are interesting and I like the title font.

35. None of the Regular Rules - Erin Downing
Thoughts: I totally didn't think this was a self-pub. Nice work. Awkward-kissing covers aren't my favorites, but this is fairly well done.

36. Edge of Truth - Natasha Hanova
 Thoughts: Oh dear. It's pretty cool that she's wearing practical clothes and I don't think I've seen a girl with dreads on a cover before, but that font and that animation. Fail.

37. Hopeless - Colleen Hoover
 Thoughts: Not all that original, but I really like it anyway. Blue is my favorite color. Also, another self-pub that I totally didn't guess was one. Good show.

38. The Crane Wife - Patrick Ness
Thoughts: I love the title font and the tagline (a rare occurrence), but this art stule is not one that appeals to me.

Cover Battle #1: Notes from Ghost Town - Kate Ellison
Catalog Cover vs. Officially Revealed Cover: So I saw this in Edelweiss' catalog, and I kind of liked it.  Only one thing keeps me liking the face cover better, since I actually really like the way the dress pools around her in the righthand cover: the tagline. "First loves never die." Automatic loathing to any cover that says anything about love not dying.

Cover Battle #2: Siege (As the World Dies #3) - Rhiannon Frater
Trade Paperback vs. Mass Market Paperback: The mass market covers for this series do offer some straight up zombie mayhem, and they're probably a wise move to attract more male readers, but they're not my style personally.

Cover Battle #3: The Shadow Reader (McKenzie Lewis #1) - Sandy Williams
US vs. French: The US cover focuses WAY too much on her butt. I do love the sword, but your eye is just drawn to her butt, and I am not okay with that. The French cover looks hot.

WTF of the Week: The Roommates: Who's the Daddy? - Michele Richard

Thoughts:
Obviously, this cover isn't well done and the subject matter leaves much to be desired. The real wtfery lies in her outfit. She appears to be some sort of hot pink pregnant superhero or something. Gross. Also, tights are not pants, and certainly are an even worse idea as pants during pregnancy. Also, the fact that the guys don't care about her at all, instead freaking out over their chess game, is hilarious.

Outstanding Cover of the Week:Some Quiet Place by Kelsey Sutton


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31 Comments:

Blogger Lenore Appelhans said...

I am not really sure who likes long hair on men. Besides the men who grow long hair, perhaps because they are deluded into thinking women like it?

November 23, 2012 at 10:25 PM  
Blogger Hannah Lorraine said...

Another awesome post =) I seriously giggled through the whole thing. And yeah..if I saw a dude wearing a denim shirt with cutoff sleeves in real life, I would point and laugh - no matter how ripped he was. Romance covers are a great source of entertainment - and for the record - when I read that a love interest has long hair I just just pretend I didn't read that part - because that's not really sexy to me (except in very special circumstances).

November 23, 2012 at 10:32 PM  
Blogger Steena said...

1. The Dreaming Field: For some reason, this reminds me of Captain Picard as a Borg. Geez, that was a nerdy reference.

2. Heart of Iron: What is with all the floating eyes?!

3. Unclaimed: I really enjoy the realistic detailing of the double belt loop in the back.

5. The Ghost of Josiah Grimshaw: Uhg, poor Josiah Grimshaw. What a terrible name. And are these two young ladies the "Morgan Sisters"? Because, if so, I have some questions about their parentage.

6. The Family Trap: "If they lose that zing and they just won't swing, then the problem falls in your lap. When your folks are square then you must prepare...what do you gotta prepare? The Family Trap!"

10. Forever My Girl: YESSSSSS! I was hoping it was THAT song. I love THAT song. I have a prejudice against book covers with guitars on them.

12. 13. and 14. There are way too many unworthily shirtless men going on this week.

15. Ride 'em Hard: Oh yeah, the Buckle Bunnies, aren't they the Playgirls that live at Hugh Hefner's ranch in Wyoming?

16. Fall of Night: Oh man, I don't know what I did to piss her off but I am SO sorry.

18. Beautiful Creatures: I don't know what this graphic novel is adapting (presumably Beautiful Creatures) so it is harder to ruin for me but, as a standalone cover, I do like the art and the font styling.

21. Facade: Good, I hope she does. His hair deserves it.

27. Genesis Queen: Oh my God, what the hell is going on in this cover?

30. Rocky Mountain Rebel: Never start a book with "Rocky Mountain" because I am going to finish it with "oysters" every time. EVERY. TIME.

31. Weird Detectives: I like the colors but I am not a huge fan of this cover. The symbols look like they are passing through his head, in one ear and out the other. And his fingers are FREAKISHLY long.

32. The Last Academy: Do academies even exist anymore? There are so many books out now about this academy or that and I'm pretty sure that is a quickly dying academic system.

Winner of the week: Shirtless male models. I neither approve of you nor your covers but you certainly seem to be taking the market by storm, good show.

November 24, 2012 at 12:35 AM  
Blogger Kat Balcombe said...

Oh man I just snorted tea out of my nose *wipes screen*

1. Without the freaky eye moon thing I'd check this one out.

2. How much shit can you cram onto one cover?

3. Is the wolf the 'her' in the tagline? Eeeewwww.

4. Hahahah Kramer! I do like the funky diving helmet/lamp thingy though. Would look cool in my shed.

5. The girl at the front creeps me out.

6. Getting married is apparently the new black. I don't get it...

7. I likey, but the font makes me feel like my eyes are going blurry, no likey.

8. Freaking BIRDS!

9. Those dolls freak me out! I like the colors though.

10. Haha I saw this cover last week and wondered when you'd discover it ;-)

11. Font is making my eyes go blurry again (maybe it IS my eyes!)

12. Long hair on men is a crime. That is all.

13. The EYES! *scrolls madly*

14. *continues scrolling*

15. bahahahaha *snorts more tea*.

16. That girl is MAD.

17. Bow chicka wow - 70s flicks are back, at least according to this cover.

18. Only the purple attracts me to this one. Otherwise, no interest at all.

19. Ohhhh I like that one!

20. I'm with you on the background, it is pretty cool.

21. Hahaha!

22. The lack of arms freak me out just a little, but I love the creepy feel, especially the storm clouds. Are leaves coming out of her eyes?!

23. Get her a burger, stat!

24. Another standard face cover *le sigh*

25. He's getting dangerously close to moob territory with those pecs.....especially the right one.

26. Can hair actually be like that? *plays with hair*. Nope, must be magical hair.

27. All greased up like that, the guys remind me of those chicken rolls all tied up with string - ewww.

28. 'Driven apart by zombies, reunited on the plains'

29. How freaked out does that rabbit look?!

30. Six Pack Ranch *falls off chair*.

31. Her hair TOTALLY matches the font!

32. Zombie Prep School = awesome idea.

33. I like it - but I think the crosshairs are a bit unnecessary.

34. Good covers on this series, definitely eye catching.

35. V good for self-pub.

36. Could it scream 'budget' any louder?

37. Doesn't really do it for me, but I have no snark.

38. Don't like it. Although the font is kinda cool.

CB #1 Despite the face thing, I do like the catalog cover slightly more, if only for the fact that on the other cover she is hugging herself REALLY hard. I dare everyone to try getting their own hands that far behind their back.

CB #2 The Mass Market covers don't work for me either, but I can see the masculine appeal.

CB #3 You really can't miss the bum on that.

WTFOW - bahahahahaha is that a towel wrapped under her stomach?!

Despite the fact I snorted almost all my tea out my nose rather than drinking it, that was totally worthwhile!

November 24, 2012 at 5:25 AM  
Blogger Ashleigh Paige said...

A Dance with Darkness: Literally the only ebook novella cover I've seen HarperTeen Impulse put effort into was Destroy Me, that Shatter Me novella. All the others have been generally lacking in effort. I'm thinking that the publisher only tried with Destroy Me because they paid seven figures for that mess and it supposedly wasn't selling as well as they wanted/needed it to.

Fall of Night: She's pissed because even she knows her series has gone on for too long. I gave up on book eleven and the author said she can keep going as long as readers want more. The series was originally supposed to end around book six or seven and we're now at fourteen.

Emerald Green: I haven't read these books and don't care to, but I love both the old and new covers. Pretty pretty pretty.

Some Quiet Place: -drools more- I NEED THIS ON MY SHELF SO I CAN TOUCH IT MOAR.

With Madness Comes the Light: I love Karina to bits, but this one is definitely out of sync with the rest of the series covers. Eek. The character narrating that book has a fleur de lis tattoo, so that's where that one came from.

November 24, 2012 at 11:50 AM  
Blogger Lilian said...

Admittedly, this is the first time that your Outstanding cover of the week matches mine (is it because there's a severe lack of gorgeousness? hmmm)

I gasped at the sight of Some Quiet Place, and I only hope she is supposed to be armless and it isn't some cruel mistake. It's just so gorgeous...and creepy at the same time. At first I thought she was wearing blindfolds, but I guess it's just her eyeshadow.

Siege: The mass-market paperbacks look atrocious with all that text thrown on there randomly. I hope that that's the spine and not the title and the author repeated. The zombie on the right also overwhelms the two main characters. Though I am not sure why the girl on the right is crossing her arms and observing while zombies are ruining her city in the trade paperback.

Hopeless: I agree that it doesn't look like a self-pub, but probably only because it slightly reminds me of the atrocity that was Burning Blue. I only wish the author's name was in a lighter color (if not white,) because now I read the "new york times bestseller" before anything else. Which might actually help market the book better...what do I know.

The Crane Wife: Oh! Ness is coming out with a new book? I agree with the title font treatment. The art on the other hand just strikes me as meehhhh. They should've had a paper artist (*points to Jeff Nishinaka*) create the whole scene.

A Fatal Likeness: I like her hair ornament, and I'm okay with the text treatment...I only wish they didn't go crazy with it on the author's name. (and the e bothers me, did they mix fonts?) hmmmm

The Last Academy: YES, ZOMBIE PREP SCHOOL! I would actually read that. Maybe.

Lilian @ A Novel Toybox

November 24, 2012 at 2:12 PM  
Blogger Nori said...

The Outstanding Cover of the Week seriously creeps me out. I don't even really know why; it just does. I think I like A Fatal Likeness the best. Something about feather hair pieces speaks to me. Also, I want Emerald Green like crazy!

November 24, 2012 at 6:48 PM  
Blogger kara-karina@Nocturnal Book Reviews said...

OK, favorites? Heart of Glass (forget the blurb, her eyes are insanely cool!) and A Fatal Likeness! Why isn't it on Goodreads yet?! I went on author's website and it's about Byron's lover who had his child O_o_o! WANT.
Also, you do know, 40% of my redheads come from your Cover Snark, right? :D
Loved the snark as usual, Christina! Afternoon Delight just killed me :)))

November 25, 2012 at 5:01 AM  
Blogger Kelsey said...

This is so cool! Love your comments, and thanks for making SQP the outstanding cover of the week. Made my day :)

November 25, 2012 at 12:13 PM  
Blogger Sarah(Sarahandherbookshelves) said...

7. I love this cover! I love the font and The headdressy thing!

20. I do like this cover, I mean pretty dress! But I miss the original covers, they where nicer! Plus they where different from the usual girl in dress thing.

22. Another Great Cover. Its definitely creepy

29. I do not understand this cover at all.. The Bunny looks pretty frightened. Believe me I know scared bunnies! I work at a pet store lol

Cover Battle #1- I prefer the real cover, but your right the tag line is icky!

November 25, 2012 at 1:58 PM  
Blogger Stephanie Sinclair said...

1. It's almost like he's winking at us.

7. LOVE!

9. Are those Angelina Jolie's lips?!

11. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to be feeling when I look at that cover, but right now that mascara has me LOLing.

15. HAHAHAHAHA! Buckle Bunnies, like playboy bunnies, except they are on the range? I have no idea, but it's funny.

18. There is a graphic novel??? GAH!

20. Classic "girl in a dress," of course! Can't go wrong with that! *dry sarcasm*

22. Everyone seems to like this cover, but I don't. It creeps me out!

25. WHAT? What are chesticles doing on that cover???

27. Oh, god. Death by fonts!

28. LOL, that's the first thing I thought too when I saw that cover, "Zombie bride!"

29. What is going on there? LOL. And what's with the random bunny? There is just a whole bunch of random things going on there.

31. I like this cover too! And I think that is just a glare from the lighting with the yellow.

32. Ohhh... Zombie prep school would be really cool. Someone should totally write that!

36. Oh, ew! Bad, cover. Bad!

Cover battles:

1. Okay, I was wondering what was going on with the cover reveals for that book. I'm not sure which one I like better though.

2. I really prefer the trade paperback.

3. OH WOW. Love the French cover! The US cover makes no sense because she doesn't even use a sword in the book. But I hear she does in the second.

WTF: GAH! Make it stop!

November 26, 2012 at 12:48 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

Who knows? I pretty much only accept to shoulder length, and then only in very rare cases.

November 26, 2012 at 2:30 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

Exactly! They can be the buffest guys in the world, but they will still get mocked and laughed at if they dress like that.

November 26, 2012 at 2:31 PM  
Blogger kimbacaffeinate said...

Girl you crack me up with your comments..thanks for the laughs!

November 26, 2012 at 2:32 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

1. Oddly, I see that.

2. Is there a floating eye? I just see an exploding dirigible.

5. I wondered about that myself.

6. Bahaha, very nice.

10. Yay! You understand my most obscure reference every week!

12-14. Always. Sadly.

15. Hugh Hefner's ranch is in Wyoming?

18. The Beautiful Creatures books DO give great title font.

21. He does have weird hair.

27. NO clue.

30. ?

31. He DOES have long fingers.

32. I'm not sure. That's a good point. Computer, research academies!

Shirtless male models have ALWAYS been everywhere on book covers, although I think they may be escaping the romance genre.

November 26, 2012 at 2:36 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

1. See, they scared you off! Why would they do that? Bad plan.
2. Oh, in steampunk, they've hardly got anything on here. You should see some of the ones a couple weeks back.
3. BAHAHA, I don't know, but yikes.
4. I think it's a lamp. It is pretty cool.
5. Me too, friend. Me too.
6. Marriage is a trap. You see?
7. Haha, I did squint at it to make sure it wasn't me. lol
8. CAW.
9. This was almost a nice cover.
10. Oops. Maybe it was on Thursday. Whatever, it wasn't going to win anyway.
11. I don't think this font is blur-inducing, so maybe both?
19. An oasis amidst the romances!
22. Not sure if they're leaves or if it's hair in her face. I'd need a HUGE image to know for sure.
23. She'd be a better archer with more meat on her bones.
25. Moob! *flails* Wow, I CANNOT look at that cover anymore.
26. Right? That's a toupee. Isn't it? *tilts head*
28. Bahahaha
29. THIS FREAKED.
30. Yup, that's for real.
31. That is SO WEIRD.
32. I thought so.
33. Hmmm, I like them. They add focus and concept.

CB1: I may or may not have just hugged myself in my office, and it is totally positive to get your hands that far around.
CB2: Man, I was counting on The Aussie Zombie to like them if anyone does.
CB3: Right? It makes me feel like such a creeper!

WTF: I was thinking a giant balloon.

November 26, 2012 at 2:46 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

Oh wow. I had no idea they paid so much for those books. I still haven't read them, but I've heard I probably won't like Shatter Me. I hate the new covers, but they did at least put a new design on it, I guess. The Iron King novellas have their own covers, but that's Harlequin.

Fall of Night: Oh, well, that would explain it. She's getting too old for this shit.

Some Quiet Place: I will take it to a quiet place and we will bond.

With Madness: The fleur de lis really doesn't look like a tattoo to me, though. Oh well. She posted recently about how she would sell better if she wrote romance, so the timing makes me think this is an effort to lure in those 50 Shades folks to enjoy Experiment in Terror.

November 26, 2012 at 2:48 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

True. Probably also because you are an art person and I am not.

I'll be really sad if the cover makes no sense with the story.

That is the spine. I was too lazy to crop it, since that's how they revealed it. I was tired, okay! Who knows, but anything's better!

Burning Blue was bad then?

The Crane Wife: I do feel like this could have been insanely gorgeous, so I don't know why they didn't go for it. Disappointed.

November 26, 2012 at 2:51 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

Hahaha, it's supposed to creep you out, though!

November 26, 2012 at 2:54 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

No idea! I really tried to find it, though. Seriously, authors/publishers, don't release a cover before the book's on Goodreads.

Teehee. I'm glad I help you hunt down gingers!

November 26, 2012 at 2:55 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

Glad you enjoyed!

November 26, 2012 at 2:55 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

20. Ha, I like the originals okay, but I'm more drawn to these. Maybe if I saw the originals in person and they had textures?

29. Me either. I have no idea what this is supposed to mean, and it wasn't on GR yet, so...

November 26, 2012 at 2:57 PM  
Blogger Kara_Malinczak said...

1. I really like this cover a lot. If I saw this in a store, I would be inspired to pick it up. Definitely.

2,3. I am never attracted to covers like these. Can we say corny?

4. I kinda like this one. Everything but the dude.

5. I agree. It's pretty awful.

6. Meh. This does nothing for me. Also, I don't care much for the title font.

7. I like it but the side filigree feels really out of place and pointless. I LOVE the font.

8. It looks self-published?

9. It makes no sense. It is not appealing. It is UGLY.

10. You might want to check for typos in your commentary on this one. Also, ANOTHER guitar? What the hell?!

11. Umm..the title font is terrible. This cover is corny. Also, I thought she was in a bathroom and that was a toilet behind her. WHAT is that behind her?

12. I HATE long hair. Also, OH LORD.

13. I am disgusted. And not turned on at all.

14. LOL LOL wut? I don't have words.

15. WHY that title? WHY??? So embarrassing.

16. I like most of the covers on this series. But this one is so meh.

17. Does anyone else think her boobs are sitting a little high on her chest? Anyone?

19. I really like this one, though admittedly I would probably not read this.

20. I LOVE this. But even more is the fact that I know the final hardcover for this series will be GREEN! My favorite color and I must have it!!

21. Sort of hot. Sort of. It's also really cheesy.

22. It's interesting. I don't know if I love it though.

23. That girl is REALLY pretty. And that's all I really have to say. Ha.

24. Yeah, this is BORING. And you are right about the tagline. Why do we even need taglines at all?

25. I have no idea about the fleur de lis, but the male protag. has that tattoo on his chest. And since this is from his POV, I get why she went with this cover.

26. OMG. LOL that hair is terrible. Looks totally posed and not in a good way.

27. Why is the bottom such a different color? It looks like two covers slapped together. And you are right about the title font. What is going on here?

28. Why is she wearing tie while being topless? This is ALL I see.

29. LOL at your commentary!

30. A blue jean vest? Seriously? This is supposed to be hot? Are you freaking kidding me?

31. Everything but the guy again. My eye immediately goes to him and he is so CHEESY looking!

32. BOOOO, I love this one. Mostly because of the purple and the silhouettes.

33. Yes, I love this one too. I think this may be my favorite of the week.

34. It catches my eye. But not in a good way.

35. I agree. This looks really professional but it does nothing for me.

36. Look at her arm position, Christina! That is NOT normal.

37. Title font is too large. Otherwise, I like it.

38. Definitely interesting. But it doesn't really appeal to me either.

CB:

1. I like the second cover better, but does she need to hug herself??

2. Definitely like the original better on this one. I don't like the MM at all.

3. Again, I like the original way better because of the background. You are right about the butt though.

WTF: Ewwww? Spandex on a pregnant woman? NOOOOOO. And hot pink? Even more NOOOOOO.

My favorite cover is Boy Nobody.

November 26, 2012 at 2:59 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

1. Lol. Yes. It is. WEIRD.

7. Historicals have some of the best covers.

9. There are so many lip stunt doubles of hers on covers, I swear.

11. Loling must be what they're going for, right? I mean, right? O_O

15. Or maybe something about belt buckles and fucking like rabbits?

18. Yup. They're everywhere.

20. But it's pretty. *is shamed*

22. Purposefully! lol.

25. Calling all the 50 Shades fans, I think.

27. *iz dead*

28. Bahaha, nice.

29. No one seems to have any clue, but I saw them talking about this author on The Readventurer, so she must be good, which makes this sadder.

31. Hmmmm.

32. *calls it. tentatively*

36. Yup.

CB3. No SWORD? The cover is an assy lie!

November 26, 2012 at 3:02 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

Anytime! (by which I mean once a week)

November 26, 2012 at 3:02 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

1. Cool. I actually kind of like it, but I'm not sure what I'm supposed to get from it, you know?

2,3. Hmmm, let me try. CORNY. Yup, I guess we can.

4. Yup. The dude's too weird.

7. Completely agreed on the side filigree. It's scarcely visible, so why bother?

8. It's Harper's new ebook imprint. I bet it doesn't get much money.

9. Whoa. You really don't like this one.

10. WHAT HAPPENED TO ME? *thuds*

11. I think it's the bell sleeve on a fuzzy white robe.

12-15. Yup. Not remotely attractive to my way of thinking.

16. Same with me.

17. I was thinking it was a bad bra. Maybe she's a man, though. Who knows?

20. I thought you liked the original cover style better?

21. I'll admit to 'sort of.'

23. Her big lips freak me out. Also that I'm not sure if she's animated or not.

24. Almost never. Sometimes they're cool, but only if they couldn't apply to another book.

26. Yeah, ugh. Or like she gets her toupee where Donald Trump does.

27. *snorts* OMG, WHY IS SHE?

30. I'm assuming he's supposed to be?

31. I like the guy better than the girl on this one.

33. This was my second favorite.

35. Same.

36. *shrugs*

38. But it's Asian!

CB1: I'm not a fan of people hugging themselves on covers.

November 26, 2012 at 3:21 PM  
Blogger Kayla Beck said...

1. *snores*

2. She is holding the parasol so the fire and debris from the EXPLOSION RIGHT BEHIND HER does not fall upon her lovely duck-faced head.

3. Naked People + Animals + Book Cover = Bestiality. Always. No exceptions. That's just how my brain works.

4. I would borrow his lantern and never return it. Well, as long as it takes light bulbs that can be purchased at the local Wal-mart. :-D

6. I like her wedding get-up. If I still had pretty ankles, it would go on my Ideas pin-board on Pinterest.

7. This is a huge win for me. Also, I need new fascinators.

8. Why don't they just put a title and author on the page? They obviously don't care. Or, they can buy some of my nature photos. They'll be a lot cheaper, I'm sure.

9. I like this a little bit. Well, except for the leaves. There may be bugs in there, and I'm afraid that they will bite her face.

11. I think I hate white covers.

12. Man + Bat = Bestiality

13. You should check out some Christine Feehan books. She's made me blush. When I was driving between home and the university at night (two hours round trip), I would listen to her novels so I wouldn't fall asleep. I loved yelling at the heroines because if a man gave her that Look, you knew he was going to do something to her with his always gigantic manhood. I would laugh until tears ran down my face.

14. Bestiality

15. Have you ever heard what a big belt buckle means on a man?

16. She's not angry - gingers have no souls.

18. I think I like this cover. I don't read a lot of graphic novels, but I think the purple artwork is pretty.

19. Creepy and interesting - I'll allow it.

20. I don't understand the city circle going into the sky. I just... No.

22. I lucked out on this cover reveal on my blog. I've gotten some doozies. This book intrigues me.

23. Or another title - What Not to Do with Photoshop

24. It's pretty. Her hair is a bit frizzy though. It reminds me of me. She just needs bushier eyebrows and red hair now.

25. The state of Louisiana and country of France do not approve of this cover.

26. I hate sand. >.<

27. You could fry some chicken with all the oil on the models on that cover!

28. I thought to myself "I want that shirt" before I even read your thought! :-D

31. Hooray for gingers with guns!

Cover Battle 1. The girl is making out with herself on the remake. We've all seen those people doing that fake kissing - it's funny in elementary school, but eye-roll inducing otherwise.

WTF - Neither of those guys is the baby's daddy. I am willing to wager a large amount of money on that.

November 26, 2012 at 6:23 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

2. Oh, good plan. Hopefully it's fire-retardant.

3. *snorts*

4. I'm sure it does. Finders keepers, right?

6. Ugh, I'm not a short wedding dress person.

8. Based on book one this cover sure doesn't mean anything, but it sure was cheap!

9. *shudders*

12. She's a VAMPIRE! Maybe. The bat does seem to be in MY BODY IS READY pose.

13. Bahahaha, his always gigantic manhood. You'd think for once a romance novelist could write about a guy with a little manhood who was super good at pleasing because he had to be.

14. Wolves are getting a lot of action this week.

15. Ummm, big belt?

20. This series is about time travel. I think that's their attempt at a visual representation.

23. I'm not the only one that doesn't like it. Yay!

24. My hair's pretty frizzy, but not that dark.

25. Bahaha.

26. Yeah, I don't get people that lay down in the sand. It will be ERRYWHERE.

27. Ewww, I would not eat that chicken.

28. I'm pretty sure she's not wearing a shirt.

31. Half ginger-half blonde.

CB1: Bahahaha.

WTF: I agree.

November 27, 2012 at 8:56 AM  
Blogger Kayla Beck said...

13. Seriously! I'm not going to GO THERE, but there's a lot to be said about a man who has to try harder. ;-)

15. It's a tombstone for a dead [insert word here]!

23. Don't get me started on the crap people do with eyes on Photoshop. I had someone try to tinker with my eyes in a picture once, and I was tempted to lose my mind. (I chose the polite road.) I do not need them to look like they're made of lightsaber awesomeness, and neither does anyone else!

27. I would never eat chicken again if that chicken was put in front of me.

28. Ugh @ me for not paying attention. I totally meant #30. I was going to completely ignore #28. :-P

November 28, 2012 at 2:08 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

13. So I've heard. :-p

15. !!!! Is that a real thing?

23. BAHAHAHA, lightsaber awesomeness is the perfect way to describe that awful PNR cover last week.

27. I still would, because chicken is delicious.

28. Oh, haha!

November 28, 2012 at 2:15 PM  
Blogger Kate C. said...

Rachel Caine's "Fall of Night" angry model reminds me of my 20 year old sister. All her photographer friends take her picture and she's always so serious/angry in them. Finally, I asked her... "Why no smile?" Apparently she feels like she looks better without it. Okaaaaaay.

January 4, 2013 at 10:37 PM  

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