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A Reader of Fictions: Cover Snark (52): In Which Tor Puts Other Novella Covers to Shame

A Reader of Fictions

Book Reviews for Just About Every Kind of Book

Thursday, April 11, 2013

Cover Snark (52): In Which Tor Puts Other Novella Covers to Shame

Welcome to Cover Snark, where the people are snarky and the covers quiver in fear. Since I don't write many snarky book reviews here on A Reader of Fictions, Cover Snark is my outlet. If you click on the title of the book, where possible, I've linked to Goodreads. Clicking on the cover itself will show you the cover in a larger size, in most cases. Feel free to love covers I hate and vice versa. Let me know your thoughts in the comments!

Shiny and New:

1. Northern Bites (Aurora Sky, Vampire Hunter #2) - Nikki Jefford
Thoughts: The redhead really needs a better grip on that knife. Also, this series needs better font treatments and background colors.

2. Lord of the Forest - Kay Berrisford
Thoughts: Mostly I am amused because this is apparently an M/M Robin Hood story, but I love that the publisher is Loose Id, which is fitting since romance novels are all about immediate gratification.

3. Compliance (Dust Chronicles #2) - Maureen McGowan
Thoughts: Note: I hate when covers are revealed like this! There should always be a version that's just the front image. Sigh. The cover itself is pretty cheesy-looking, despite the imminent ambush.

4. The Other Fish in the Sea (Grab Your Pole #2) - Jenn Cooksey
Thoughts: Grab Your Pole! *snorts* While you wait to catch another fish, you can always take your satisfaction in hand!

5. The Iron Traitor (The Iron Fey: Call of the Forgotten #2) - Julie Kagawa
Thoughts: This dude is so unattractive to me. I literally cackled with a mixture of hilarity and horror when I first saw this cover. Is it just me or does he look way too old to be on a YA cover? What happened to the shirtless guy cover? I never thought I would be nostalgic for that.

6. Son of a Mermaid - Katie O' Sullivan
Thoughts: I like how the (presumably) mother's tale is waving like "Bye, bitch, bye!" What a caring mom!

7. Scorched - Mari Mancusi
Thoughts: Shiny blue eyes aside, that dragon is freaking awesome. Something feels a little bit off for me, maybe the fact that I can't tell if she actually has a shirt on or if that's why she's hiding behind the dragon's paw. Do dragons have paws?

8. Breath of Iron (Clockwork Agents #2) - Kate Cross
Thoughts: I'm surprised Victoria's Secret hasn't launched a steampunk-inspired line. They should get on that. In other news, Anne of Green Gables would love that jacket so hard.

9. The Necromancer's House - Christopher Buehlman
Thoughts: Caw!

10. Black and Blue (Otherworld Assassin #2) - Gena Showalter
Thoughts: I slept in roughly this position on an airplane once. It was NOT comfortable at all. Just saying. I so love the blue dress, though, because I am sucker for gorgeous dresses.

11. Terminated (Revivalist #3) - Rachel Caine
Thoughts: She looks a bit like a blonde Kimberly Williams Paisley, no? Just noticed the Weeping Angel style statue in the background. Thank you, Doctor Who, for making me weep with fear (eyes wide open) whenever I see an angel statue.

12. Dissonance - Erica O'Rourke
Thoughts: This is gorgeous, but I think it's weird that part of the title is up top and now just says SON, like this is some weird magazine for fathers or sons.

13. The Grave Winner - Lindsey R. Loucks
Thoughts: Ehhhh, Her outfit reminds me of Jenny Humphrey on Gossip Girl.

14. Come Alive (Experiment in Terror #7) - Karina Halle
Thoughts: Very pretty. I'm not really seeing the terror, but I don't much care. Pretties of over terrors any day.

15. Concrete Evidence - Rachel Grant
Thoughts: In case you were doubting what there was hard evidence of (his boner), they helpfully included the Washington Monument.

16. Archangel's Legion (Guild Hunter #6) - Nalini Singh
Thoughts: Seriously, why do certain pubs put First Time in Print on their new books that are just generally being published for the first time ever? Is it because all the PNR covers look sort of similar and they want to distinguish the new ones? I don't get it. Also, BLEH ANGEL WINGS.

17. Vitro - Jessica Khoury
Thoughts: This might not be the final cover, so just be aware of that. As far as I can tell, this leaked on to Goodreads. Anyway, I like this, though the tagline is lame: "The island hides a dark secret." And I always thought test tube islands were open books.

18. Live for You (Boys of the South #1) - Marquita Valentine
Thoughts: So many "nationally bestselling authors" running around. How is this determined? Also, why is Live on there three times? Live Live Live for You.

19. Pushed (Sense Thieves #2) - Corrine Jackson
Thoughts: What the eff? For one thing, yuck, but it doesn't come close to matching the first book in the series. In fact, it looks like the sequel to THIS book.

20. Salvation (Guardian Angel #3) - Skyla Madi
Thoughts: Titles do not need wings. Though I suppose it's better than her having wings. Mostly, I am concerned about the fact that she's apparently about to spontaneously combust.

21. Angel Fever (Angel #3) - L. A. Weatherly
Thoughts: I hate when my hair does this in the wind. Someone get this girl a hair tie STAT.

22. Lost & Found - Nicole Williams
Thoughts: My guess: Lost her virginity & Found multiple orgasms.

23. Sentinel (Covenant #5) - Jennifer L. Armentrout
Thoughts: Simple and classy. Perhaps not my favorite of the series, but I do like the look of these covers.

24. Skin Deep (DarkWorld #1)- T.G. Ayer
Thoughts: For this kind of cover, I do rather like this, though the slight blurriness to the person bothers me and I HATE the style of the A in the author font treatment with a burning passion.

25. Season of Wonder (Remnants #1) - Lisa Tawn Bergren
Thoughts: How not to reveal your cover! Other problems: The series is larger than the book title AND it's written on the cover twice. The photo of the girl looks seriously weird too, greasy and poorly photo-shopped.

26. More Than This - Patrick Ness
Thoughts: I never would have pegged this as a YA cover. It looks like an adult lit fic cover.

27. Control (Shift #2) - Kim Curran
Thoughts: Pretty cool, though I see an absolute lack of control.

28. Into the Light (Guardian Novella) - Meljean Brook
Thoughts: If it's his hunger, why is the bite on HIS arm? Is there another him?

29. Novellas & Stories - Meljean Brook, Carolyn Crane, & Jessica Sims
Thoughts: I like how the placement of Carolyn Crane's name makes it look like he has an earring.

30. Grimoire of the Lamb (The Iron Druid Chronicles #0.4) - Kevin Hearne
Thoughts: Kayla will be mad, but I can't look at his little goatee without snorting. It makes me think of that scene in Clueless where Josh tries to grow facial hair and Cher makes fun of him.

31. The Dark Discovery of Jack Dandy - Kady Cross
Thoughts: I like the color and background, but my hat is ultimately not off to this cover.

32. The Stranger - Anna Banks
Thoughts: This is where Tor starts kicking ass with the covers for their Tor.com originals. Where most pubs walk these sorts of things in, Tor brought out the big guns.

33. Brimstone and Marmalade - Aaron Corwin
Thoughts: Children are so creepy. *shudders*

34. Porn and Revolution in the Peaceable Kingdom - Micaela Morrissette
Thoughts: I think the reason this freaks me out is that the giant, comic book looking dude is wearing lipstick.

35. The Ministry of Changes - Marissa Lingen
Thoughts: Ooh, pretty colors. Also, that storage unit is boss. I could use that for my clothing.

36. A Visit to the House on Terminal Hill - Elizabeth Knox
Thoughts: A bit less black would spice this up more.

37. Jake and the Other Girl - Emmy Laybourne
Thoughts: The fact that the car reads "Help Me" is a nice touch.

38. The Too-Clever Fox - Leigh Bardugo
Thoughts: As Heather of Coffee-Stained Pages pointed out, this is somewhat reminiscent of Tender Morsels, but I love the style of the art here much more.

39. What's Left of Us - Ari Tucker 
Thoughts: Apparently in addition to being weak to pretty dress covers, I also really like black and white photos with gorgeous font colors.

40. Passion Potion - Mary Beth Daniels
Thoughts: Love potion #69.

41. Don't Hate the Player...Hate the Game - Katie Ashley
Thoughts: I suppose this title was inevitably going to show up in new adult at some point. Does anyone else not think this dude looks like a player? And that this girl looks like she stole this sweater from Felicity?

42. Unsouled (Unwind Trilogy #3) - Neal Shusterman
Thoughts: Creepy, but not quite as creepy as the last. Except that one of them has open eyes. Oh god, they're trying to take my soul so I'm one of them AHhhhhhh.

43. Dead Girls Don't Lie - Jennifer Shaw Wolf
Thoughts: Oh no. It's time for another edition of "this looks like something I can't remember at all." Will I ever figure out what cover I'm thinking of? Tune in next time to find out.

44. Goodbye, Rebel Blue - Shelley Coriell
Thoughts: Oh hey, a tagline that actually tells me about the book. Oh god, I just noticed the eye in the font. DO NOT LIKE. *hides*

Cover Battles:

1. Witchstruck (The Tudor Witch Trilogy #1) - Victoria Lamb
UK vs. US: While I do like the pretty colors, major points off for the stock image, which I recognized from The Exceptionals. I'm not a fan of those, so I'll go for the more traditional historical fiction cover. Winner: UK.
Which Witchstruck cover do you prefer?
  
pollcode.com free polls 

2. Shark Bait (Grab Your Pole #1) - Jenn Cooksey
Original vs. Redesign: Heh heh heh. I can't get over that series name. Winner: Meh. Don't really care.
Which Shark Bait cover do you prefer?
  
pollcode.com free polls 

3. Shadow & Bone (Grisha #1) - Leigh Bardugo
US vs. French: The French cover has been growing on me the more I look at it, but I still just love the style of the US covers for this series. Winner: US.
Which Shadow & Bone cover do you prefer?
  
pollcode.com free polls 

4. Starters (Starters and Enders #1) – Lissa Price
Hardback vs. Paperback: Hmmm, well, I think the cover on the left really captures the story, but it also scares the bejeezus out of me. I'm pretty sure the redesign will sell more, and it's interesting that they're appealing to the MTV crowd. Both taglines suck. Winner: Redesign, because I'm not afraid to look at it. In fact, I can't stop staring into her eyes.
Which Starters cover do you prefer?
  
pollcode.com free polls 

5. The Memory of After (The Memory Chronicles #1) - Lenore Appelhans
Hardback vs. Paperback: It's cool that they kept the same model for this redesign, at least. I do think there's an awesome glamour to the new look, but I loved the original font treatment and I can't handle the crazy hairstyle (Felicia's a ponytail girl) or the fish face the model is making. Winner: Level 2.
Which cover/title do you prefer?
  
pollcode.com free polls 

6. Crown of Midnight (Throne of Glass #2) - Sarah J. Maas
UK vs. US: Thank goodness the US clued in to how much better the UK look was and switched. Never have I been more thrilled about a redesign. I'm really not sure which of these prefer, but I do know I don't like this one as well as Throne of Glass'. Winner: US, I guess, because I like the font treatment a bit better.
Which Crown of Midnight cover do you prefer?
  
pollcode.com free polls 

7. The Wicked and the Just - J. Anderson Coats
Hardback vs. Paperback: Wahh, I do not like this new look. It's too...Disney movie or something. Winner: Hardback.
Which The Wicked and the Just cover do you prefer?
  
pollcode.com free polls 

8. Keep Holding On - Susane Colasanti
Hardback vs. Paperback: Neither one of these is really my style. I guess the hardback seems more realistic, what with the dude not having a heart painted on his hand. Winner: Eh.
Which Keep Holding On cover do you prefer?
  
pollcode.com free polls 

WTF of the Week:

1. Animate Me - Ruth Clampett
 Thoughts: This cover is drawn on a Starbucks coffee cup. WHAT?

2. What She's Looking For - Trent Evans

 Thoughts: This is a BDSM novel. Apparently he tortures her by asking her to see if she can get her elbows to touch behind her back. KINKY.

3. Montana Mustangs (The Nymph Series #2) - Danica Winters
Thoughts: There's a reason sexy men are sometimes called stallions. ;)


Outstanding Cover of the Week:
The Too-Clever Fox by Leigh Bardugo

Learn More:

Leigh's Site

Labels:

37 Comments:

Blogger Tez Miller said...

15. CONCRETE EVIDENCE. Family Guy taught me that DC governmental landmarks look like a penis, a giant boob, and an old president on the toilet ;-)

20. SALVATION. Yep, totally looks like her boob's on fire ;-)

30. GRIMOIRE OF THE LAMB. I don't like the title. I want a sheep on the cover, damn it! ;-) (Yes, I know, "Lamb of God", but BAA to that!)

34. PORN AND REVOLUTION IN THE PEACEABLE KINGDOM. Sounds like a non-fic title.

36. A VISIT TO THE HOUSE ON TERMINAL HILL. It has "terminal" in its name, for crying out loud - why would you visit there when it's so obvious someone will die?! ;-)

April 11, 2013 at 5:50 AM  
Blogger Bekka said...

4. I think this is really cute! Not something I'd be interested in, or something I'd carry around in public, but pretty adorable.

7. I would say talon. Like a bird? I really like this cover.

10. Way too much blue. I like the dress, but I need something to cut away from the blueness of it all. Also, her position reminds me of that project that takes apart the treatment of female characters in comics and how their spines are basically twisted so we can view their front and back at the same time.

17. I want to like this, but something isn't working for me. Maybe I just have to see a larger version.

18. That has got to be the least comfortable kiss I've seen on an NA cover. They aren't touching besides their lips. They hardly look like they like each other.

23. Wow, that is horrible. I mean, the cover by itself isn't bad, it reminds me of Looking for Alaska. BUT. When you put it with the other covers, it's horrible. I had to actually look it up to see which series it was because it does NOT look like the rest of them at all.

30. *actually screaming* That GOATEE is HORRIBLE. HORRIBLE. Generally goatees are horrible anyway, but that one is the WORST.

32. This is awesome! I'm tired of one-offs or novellas getting the short end of the stick with covers. This is great.

33. WANT. Want want want. Kids are terrifying, but I like creepy covers like this.

38. When I was scrolling down to get to the comment form, I briefly saw this one. I thought it was going to be a sequel to Tender Morsels, so I was a little disappointed. But now that I see it (and know that it's not) I REALLY like it!

41. Horrible title is horrible. Also, this reminds me of those crappy pictures that circulate on FB, with the hipster looking couples and irrelevant, stupid quotes stuck on them. I hate it.

4. Is that Amanda Bynes on the new cover of Starters?

April 11, 2013 at 5:58 AM  
Blogger Kimberly @ Midnight Book Girl said...

3. Just to satisfy my own curiosity I looked at the cover for the first book in the series and I think they are both cheesy.

5. Way, way, way too old. Also, silver eyes.

9. I find this cover disturbing in a good way, but I hate where they put "a novel." It's distracting.

15. Wasn't there another cover like this a few weeks ago? I hope this doesn't become a thing.

17. I do like the cover, but Origin was only meh so I'm not sure I want to read this.

18. They determine their bestselling author status by appearing on any list, even if they are #1298. As long as they make a list they consider that "bestselling." I do not.

23. I haven't read any of these books, but I do love all the covers. However this one looks like all the erotica books that have been published lately.

27. Exciting, funny, clever, scary and captivating? It seems all they left out was the romance (which is probably there anyway!

CB4. I don't find the original cover of starters creepy at all. I do not like the coloring of the new cover.

April 11, 2013 at 6:43 AM  
Blogger A Library Girl said...

I actually thought the cover for Animate Me was kind of cute...and the I looked on Good reads and saw it's yet another P2P fabric. No thank you. I wish that trend would go away.

April 11, 2013 at 7:54 AM  
Blogger A Library Girl said...

Pff. Fanfic, not fabric, and Goodreads, not Good reads. I've never had to deal with Autocorrect before. It's really annoying.

April 11, 2013 at 7:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

5. Ugh. His hair just looks unwashed. This is not attractive.
7. She's got a dark brown tank top on. You can see it through the dragon's talons. I'd say dragons have claws, rather than paws, but *shrugs* it doesn't really matter.
10. The colours make me think of Leigh Fallon's Carrier of the Mark. I know the pose is completely different, but that blue... and the grey... and the dress... and the general vibe...
13. Clearly silver hair is in right now.
22. "My guess: Lost her virginity & Found multiple orgasms." BAHAHAHAHA. That is all.
33. "Brimstone and Marmalade" is the strangest title. I am slightly intrieged now.
34. But why is the lipstick only on the guy's top lip? Where is the balance?
41. He doesn't look like a player at all. He looks like the kind of guy who'd call your dad 'Sir' and listen patiently to your elderly relatives long and boring stories at family get-togethers. I don't mind her sweater, but I have a tragic weakness for oversized sweaters.

April 11, 2013 at 8:41 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

15. Politicians do have dirty minds, so I'm not surprised.

20. That it does.

30. Ha, and before there was a crocodile. These people are confused.

34. O_o

36. Maybe they thought that was where the train station was?

April 11, 2013 at 8:55 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

4. Hahaha, a secret shame book?

7. Well, I was going to say claws or something, but there's also foot there, you know? It's not just the claws or talons.

10. Agreed. I do love blue, but I think there's too much blue and grey. Maybe changing her skin from marble would help.

17. As I said, it's not necessarily the final cover. It was taken off of GR, so I suspect it's not, but I think the leaks are interesting to look at too.

18. Can you imagine having to pose with your lips all puckered like that for hours? Also, yeah, they really aren't touching. It looks like they've got their hands behind their backs.

23. Huh. Based on my memory it wasn't too far off, but I didn't look them up again.

30. Bahahaha.

32. Isn't it?

33. Nothing's more horrifying to me than kids. Well, okay, bees. Bees are more horrifying.

38. :-D

41. I don't think I've seen these photos.

4. No?

April 11, 2013 at 8:59 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

3. Yeah, the covers definitely match.

5. Bleh.

9. I hate when they put A Novel on as well. It's usually pretty damn obvious it's a novel, not a dictionary or a toaster.

15. There was!

17. Oh I def do not want to read it. I thought Origin was awful.

18. Um, wow. Really?

23. *snorts*

27. Looks like they're marketing to boys, so maybe not, but probably yes.

4. Really? She terrifies me.

April 11, 2013 at 9:02 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

I think the cover for Animate Me approaches cute, but it's not been done quite right. It probably shouldn't be on an actual Starbucks cup, because ugh product placement, and the background is so weird.

April 11, 2013 at 9:04 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

5. He's like the heir to David Bowie's Goblin King throne.

7. But claws are on their feet, not the whole foot. I guess it's a foot. I don't know. She probably does have a top on, but I'm not a hundred percent convinced.

10. No, it's very similar in concept. She just got tired and collapsed on a swing.

13. I guess so. X_X

22. ;)

33. It is odd. Maybe she invites death to a tea party?

34. I think it's on the bottom too, but his lip is very thin.

41. Hahaha.

April 11, 2013 at 9:09 AM  
Blogger Amy said...

I'm not even going to say I'm going to try to make this short because we know I would be lying lol!!

1. Yeah, the redhead doesn't look like she's ready to fight holding her knife like that.

2. Hahaha!! Okay, okay. Ummm wouldn't he have better protection in the woods with some more clothes on?

3. That guy is totally going to jump off that building right on her.

5. That guy totally looks too old to be on the cover. I hate when covers are like that. I mean, how hard is it to get a cover model that at least looks age appropriate. (unless it's supposed to be an older guy on this cover, I don't know, I still haven't read The Lost Prince yet.)

7. That cover is pretty badass. She does have a shirt on, you can see the bottom of her tank top lol!! Why is she hugging the dragons paw... claw... hand(?) is a better question haha!!

9. That cover is quite boring, and the title seems to stand out almost too much against the blurry background.

10. I actually kind of like that cover. It's a bit of an odd position she is in. I just finished the audio of the first book and enjoyed it. I am definitely curious about this one!

12. I do like that cover. It's pretty. It kinda messes with my eyes if I look at it too long though.

14. That cover is really awesome!! I really like it! I really need to start that series too. I have the first 5 books.

15. The whole floating heads thing always bothers me on covers. I don't know why.

17. That is a cool cover. I like the test tube thing.

18. Ugh, another black and white kissy cover with colored font. Next please!

20. You mean it's not normal to have a glowing light coming from your boob? *calls doctor*

22. Hahahaha!! Well at least she would have found something good right?

23. I think that the Covenant series has such gorgeous covers. This one isn't my favorite either, but it's fitting and I like the simplicity of it. As a whole this series has some of my favorite covers.

26. That cover kind of hurts my eyes. Maybe my eyes are just too sensitive lol!!

32. I really like illustrated covers and Tor has some pretty awesome ones. Like the As the World Dies series. Those are fantastic!!

33. That is a creepy looking little girl. And did I just say I like illustrated covers? I'm not diggin' this one at all.

34. Where is his bottom lip?

37. I'm not sure what to think of this cover. I like it, but I feel like it has too much blank space or something. I agree about the car saying "help me". That's awesome!

39. You know, I loved the black and white cover with colored font at first, but it seems like EVERY cover is like that now. Though, I do kind of like this one because at least it's not zoomed in on the couples face.

42. Ohhh the one with the open eyes is quite creepy!!

44. I kind of like that cover!! The tagline is pretty good too.

I have to do this in two comments because it says it can't be more than 4,096 characters. What kind of number is that anyways?!!!

April 11, 2013 at 10:39 AM  
Blogger Amy said...

Cover Battles

2. Thought the first cover is totally cute, I really do like the new cover better. I have heard that despite sounding cheesy that it's actually a super awesome book. I will maybe eventually read it.

3. I just love the US cover. It's awesome!

4. I like the redesign, but I think the first one just goes much better with the story. I like how it's slightly creepy because the whole idea of it is creepy. I do agree that I think the new cover will sell more books though.

5. Although I didn't like the book, I thought the cover was awesome. Why did they change the title too? That's weird.

6. I'm going with the US on this one. I like the white background. I think it makes it stand out more.

7. Definitely hardcover. I don't like the paperback one at all.

8. I like the hardcover one. I think it goes with the book better.

WTF of the Week

1. I think it is a funny cover. I like the drawing, but I think it would have worked better on just a plain white background.

2. That is a very odd position. Oh wait, are her hands tied together? And where are her clothes? Is it normal for these people to be outside at night naked?

Outstanding Cover of the Week

Yes, that cover is awesome. I could stare at it all day.

April 11, 2013 at 10:39 AM  
Blogger Sara @ Forever 17 Books said...

5. Legit thought it was Jamie Campbell Bower at first. lol I don't find him attractive either and this cover does not work for me.
10. I'm a sucker for blue so I actually like this one. It would attract my attention, that's for sure.
13. I like this one too, for some reason.
18. That kiss reminds me of like a wedding/engagement photo where the photographer tells you to kiss and it feels weird having to do it for a photo. Like they aren't really into it.
19. WHAT?1 WHYYYYYY?? It doesn't look anything like the first cover. Never would have guessed this was from the same series. Not that I've read it though. But I liked the first cover a lot.
26. Not a fan of the cover but omg thank you for letting me know Patrick Ness has a new book coming out!
34. O.o
Cover Battle:
4: I really think they should have kept the cover more the same if they were going to change the title so it doesn't confuse consumers. I mean, if I didn't blog or know more about it, I would never realize it was the same book.
WTF:
1. I love the drawing but wish it wasn't on a coffee cup...

April 11, 2013 at 10:45 AM  
Blogger Kimberly @ Caffeinated Reviewer said...

I have mad love for these posts when you do it. I love sitting here drinking my coffee and ogling book covers. I actually like the original Starter cover and do not like either Shark covers the rest we agree on.

April 11, 2013 at 10:48 AM  
Blogger Katie said...

So I thought I'd actually do what you suggest with these things (2 windows, comment on each one). Annnnnnnnd go:

1. That girl looks like Isla Fisher.
2. If I don't see another shirtless dude romance book cover, it'll be too soon. *yawn*
3. Yeah, I don't like seeing that whole wrap-around either. That's what the book's for, yo.
4. I actually sorta like the font treatment of this one, though not the graphics.
5. This one hurts my heart, just because it's Julie. Also, it def looks sorta like David Bowie, and we all know how THAT turned out for me. *shudders* (Oh, and did they change this title? I feel like it used to be "The Traitor Son.")
6. I still don't understand how mermaids have babies...
7. What's off is she's holding the dragon's hand. Dragons can't be BA when they hold people's hands.
8. LOL to your comment. A Victoria Secret steampunk like would be baller! (Would you judge me if I bought something from it? haha)
9. Thoughts: boring.
10. THE DRESSSSSSS. I actually like this one I think.
11. This girl just doesn't look like she could kill me. Maybe it's the outfit or the sunglasses on her head, which to me, just screams, "I got off work. Yay for Friday!" not "Imma kill you!"
12. No complaints with this one. In. Love.
13. YES, IT DOES LOOK LIKE JENNY HUMPHREY!
14. Meh. Boring again IMHO.
15. Your comment made me snort. Phallic symbols abound!
16. Yeah, UF always looks the same to me, and I'm just over them in general. Someone should have a cover with meek, nice characters drinking tea and watching television, just for the sake of change.
17. Oooo I haven't seen this. LOVE IT! A lot better than her first cover I think.
18. It's an echo, can't you tell? Duh, Christina! *slaps forehead*
19. Oh, man. Poor Corrine. Kensington doesn't usually have awesome covers but they're not typically this bad. Yuck.
20. NOTHING NEEDS WINGS ANYMORE! Becca Fitzpatrick got like the only cool angel covers ever. All the others are dumb in comparison. Let's move on, designers.
21. Meh.
22. Too much like a kissing cover, which I'm not into at all.
23. Well. It's...simple. Idk. I don't like these covers. BUT at least they look different. Although this one sorta reminds me of LOOKING FOR ALASKA. (this one: http://www.goodreads.com/book/photo/99561.Looking_for_Alaska)
24. Gah, I'm getting tired of making comments about all these bad covers. How do you do this every week?! *wipes sweat off forehead*
25. I was really disappointed with this one, just because I love Lisa. Also, I think this new imprint sounds really cool. But they need to get better covers stat.
26. Ooooo I like this. No, it doesn't scream YA, but it's still cool.
27. I like this one, and I think it matches the first one really well. But let's be real: I almost always love Strange Chemistry covers. They're awesome.
28. Umm...creepy.
29. HAHA! I didn't even notice the "C" earring until you mentioned it, but you're so right!
30. Terrible hair and terrible facial hair. That is all.
31. Oooo me likey! Also JACK DANDY!!! *fangirls* *makes grabby hands*
32. OMG! That's gorgeous! Wow. Very anime-ish but in a super cool way. Love, love, love!
33. Def creepy!
34. The lipstick thing is weird but this is still super cool-looking.
35. Meh.
36. I like this, though it doesn't grab me. It's just pretty.
37. Very Impressionist painting-esque.
38. I likes this a lot. Also, is this about Sturmhond? BECAUSE IT SHOULD BE. Although I'm still dying for my short about the Darkling. *eyes Leigh Bardugo meaningfully*
39. Meh.
40. Oh, new adult... *sigh*
41. I like her sweater. But that's a terrible title. Bleck.
42. *backs away from computer slowly*
43. Mediocre
44. Oh, I like this!

WHEW! Jeez. I feel like I just ran a commenting marathoning. IF THIS COMMENT GETS EATEN BY BLOGGER I'M GOING TO KILL SOMETHING.

April 11, 2013 at 10:56 AM  
Blogger Katie said...

MWAHAHAHA! It didn't get eaten :)

April 11, 2013 at 10:57 AM  
Blogger Dragana M. said...

Ok for once I tried to comment a bit more. I spent my snark half way through but I gave my best. I must practice more. :)

1. Also someone needs to learn to use Photoshop better, I could merge those images to look better/more natural.

2. Lord of the muscles xD m/m robin hood OMG You gotta wonder who is love interest... friar Tuck? :D

4. LOL I almost decorated my keyboard and monitor with juice. It serves me right, I should know better than to drink while reading cover snark. :D

5. Agree. Looks too old. I think it's the hair.

7. DRAGON! Instant tbr add. Can't wait! Yay! What? You dare to snark on dragon. Dishonor on you, dishonor on your cow... :p

8. I kinda like it. Much better than book #2 and #1. But that lacy top is definitely wrong choice.

9. *snooze*

10. Blue is my favorite color and I never thought I would say that there is too much of that color on cover but... This is so blue it hurts my eyes.

12. Like magazine cover that had printing error. Don't like.

17. I like it. But I am sucker for beach/sea. :)

18. Bleh. The same like all other NA romance covers. And I also wonder what's with livex3...

20. Cute. Could be better without wings and that light swirl.

21. I thought the same thing when I saw that cover! :o

22. I would say good guess. :D

25. OMG Weirdest cover reveal ever!

32. :o lovely!

34. Reminds me of Barbarella. :D

CB1: UK
CB2: /
CB3: US
CB4: Paperback - less scary
CB5: Level2 - love the dots
CB6: UK, don't like orange bg in US version
CB7: Paperback - Disney yay :D
CB8: Both are cute.

April 11, 2013 at 11:07 AM  
Blogger Ashleigh Paige said...

Awwww yeah, Cover Snark time! Best enjoyed with a chocolate cake donut.

1. The redhead's face is like "Fuuuuuuuuuuck, why am I even here?"

5. Ew ew ew ew ew. I didn't like the first cover for this spinoff because SOMETHING serious was wrong with the guy's chest, but you know what? I'll take the screwy chest over this guy any day.

6. That's just ADORABLE. Can I keep it?

10. Yeah, that position is only comfortable when one is on something soft like a bed. Other than that, I love this cover! Pretty dress and colors. -drools-

11. ...I think we've ALL been scarred by the Weeping Angels at this point. Episodes featuring them are the only episodes of Doctor Who I want to watch. For whatever reason, I can't get into it otherwise.

12. It's just too weird for me. I don't like it. :/

14. A rain of ash and general doom? I don't know, but I like it too. Pretty!

17. The tagline led me to the same thought you went to, but I kind of like the leaked cover. A little creepy. Then again, I think anything to do with science is evil/creepy. I'm also gigglesnorting at the love interest's name: Jim Julien. It's so much fun to say!

19. I sense a redesign coming and it won't be pretty. This one is pretty bad, yeah. I started laughing when I realized it wasn't a self-pubbed book but the sequel to one whose cover I knew well.

22. I automatically flipped this one off due to the author. FACT (according to my heavily biased brain): Nicole Williams is a terrible writer.

23. Rather... blah. Like someone remembered they needed a cover and threw crap together on a black background at the last minute.

26. Looking at it for too long makes my eyes flip out.

28. Those are definitely bug bites that he couldn't stop scratching.

32: I love the Tor.com originals covers because the artists they have are AMAZING. I'm never going to touch anything by Anna Banks, but I'll drool over The Stranger's cover.

34. The title makes me want to giggle. I'm still a teenager, after all. :P

38. That is SO COOL. I wish I had time to read Siege and Storm now (I'm going for it even though I didn't like Shadow and Bone).

40: She looks annoyed, not passionate.

42. See you in my nightmares, cover!

1. I got won over by the pretty colors. Sorry. If this one shows up on NetGalley, I'll go for it.

4. I'm sad they redesigned it. :( I don't want to read the book, but I want more good-creepy covers, which the original was. It also looked awesome in-person!

5. I love everything about Level 2's cover better. If only they had kept all that and simply put added a new title. :(

6. If I could figure out her pose, I'd try it myself to see if it's boobs-and-butt, but it's so slight that I can't. Either way, I'm buying the Throne of Glass paperback and Crown of Midnight hardcover. I MUST. THE PRETTY NEEDED.

3. ...I thought the same thing. D:



April 11, 2013 at 11:40 AM  
Blogger Kimberly @ Midnight Book Girl said...

I don't have any factual support to #18, it's just a guess. There are so many different lists and some of them go on forever and I'm just assuming that's where some of these "bestselling" tags have come from.

April 11, 2013 at 11:49 AM  
Blogger Lenore Appelhans said...

27 - Your comment made me LOL. Hard.

April 11, 2013 at 12:10 PM  
Blogger Christina Reads YA said...

AHHMAHGAWDS didn't know about the Too-Clever Fox, SO THANK YOU. Making sure to keep my eye out for that. Also, I don't think I will ever get tired of your snark snarkiness ;) on NA. You don't like the Crown of Midnight covers as much? I actually love the colors for it - I think they're a lot better than the purple parts for ToG, but I like those too. And What's Left of Us has such a pretty cover, I'm almost tempted to read it though it looks like another NA. Almost.

April 11, 2013 at 12:27 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

5. I find this cover REALLY creepy/gross with the silver hair, eyebrows AND eyes. Like, whaaat? Maybe just choose one?

8. haha, loved your comments on this one.

13. Her right hand looks... weird.

18.UGH I do not like. That font for the name looks like Word Art :/ I actually think the image isn't bad, so it had some potential :(

22. LOL

28. My thoughts exactly. Doesn't make sense at all!

32. That cover is so neat!

33. Creepy kid, but I like the artwork. This would have looked awesome if the title was done in typography. Also, just noticed that the artist's signature is still there in the right hand corner -- that's kind of weird to leave on, no?

35. OHH I really like this one!

43. Unfortunately there are SO many dead girl covers you could be thinking of :(

44. I liked this cover until I noticed the eye too, eeek!

Cover Battles
4. I hate both covers, ugh.

7. I LOVED the original, the redesign definitely does not give off the same feel!

April 11, 2013 at 1:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

God do I look forward to these. The snark, the cover candy, the cray cray authors who sometimes stop by to put their foot in it......PLEASE KEEP DOING THIS FOREVER, it is endlessly entertaining. :-)


#7 OMG, girl that dragon is not a practical solution for your nudity. Get a shirt.

#13 EWWWW Jenny....ugh. NO. Any cover channeling JH needs a serious do-over.

#14 LOVE this. I actually do think it’s a little creepy, I don’t know why. It feels kind of nightmarish.

#15 “In case you were doubting what there was hard evidence of (his boner), they helpfully included the Washington Monument.” <----DIES laughing

#23 This is my least favorite of the covers, but I do like the overall series look, so I’ll deal I guess.

#26 EFF that’s awesome! It does look like adult lit fic, but I like!

#32 Tor is bringing it big time. Love these novella covers. Same artist as for Meyer's Glitches? Looks like ti.

I have to agree, Leigh's cover wins the day!

April 11, 2013 at 3:03 PM  
Blogger Kayla Beck said...

1. Unless they are near the Artic circle, there should not be the Aurora Borealis.

2. I'm impressed because they didn't feel the urge to put any animals with the half-naked man on the cover.

5. I think I like blonde men. I also like this being an older-looking gentleman. I don't feel bad lusting after him.

7. I do like the dragon, but I feel like she's asking for death.

8. I think steampunk lingerie is an excellent idea. I want a compass on one bra cup and a clock on the other.

9. This is quite dull.

12. I fucking love this. FUCKING LOVE THIS!

16. Her bra is too small.

26. It's very interesting, but I can't see a teen picking this up.

30. I don't care what you say, Christina, but Atticus is dead sexy, and Tor should never release the name of this cover model. We would have curly-haired ginger babies until my uterus exploded.

33. I will own this. That's what my mom looked like in her baby pictures. Yes, she is probably that evil, too. :-D

34. Her freckles look like blood spatter.

40. She has an overbite.

41. I may buy a copy of this just so I can burn the fucking thing. That phrase died when I was in HIGH SCHOOL and that was over a million years ago.

CB1. I like the UK version the best, but jeebus I want to feed that girl!

cB4. I liked the original because it made me feel so uncomfortable. The pb should've at least had the different eye color thing going on.

CB5. Wait a minute. You're telling me they renamed the bob-damned book? Why would they do that?!

CB6. Looks like I'm buying another UK version to match the first one.

April 11, 2013 at 5:01 PM  
Blogger Shelver506 said...

I have one comment and one comment only: JACK DANDY BOOK?!?!?! I hated that series, but I ADORED Jack Dandy.

Okay one more: I'm excited that REBEL BLUE finally has a cover, because it sounded good.

One more, one more! Because I just have to say... Shark Bait, ooh-ha-ha!

April 11, 2013 at 8:20 PM  
Blogger Heather said...

14. I don't even care what this is about; I want it because it's pretty!

38. BOOM! I'M FAMOUS! haha. Full disclosure: I am reading Tender Morsels right now, so it isn't surprising that it was on my mind when I saw this cover. I think this is my favorite cover of the week, too!

42. I am thoroughly creeped out, and I can't wait to read this!

April 12, 2013 at 10:40 AM  
Blogger Asheley T. said...

Omg there are seriously too many on here to comment on! But you're so freaking right, TOR is ALWAYS the best. They've been on par with the best for a while now. They catch my eye every time even if i don't end up reading the book or novella.

Also, it's really funny but before I clicked your links, I thought Pushed by Corrine Jackson looked exactly like Recalled too! Great minds!

April 12, 2013 at 6:09 PM  
Blogger Kara_Malinczak said...

1. Oh, I feel so bad but this is awful.

3. This is why the snipping tool is your friend.

4. OHHHHH I laughed too! That's seriously the series name? I DIE.

5. DUDE. That's creepy. Not sexy. NIGHTMARES incoming.

6. LOL your comments are cracking me up this week!

7. I love this cover. That is all.

8. You're right. I think it would sell really well. But maybe Frederick's should take it on. That's more kinda their thing. :D

9. I actually love this cover. I need to go check this book out!

10. I love the blue dress as well but somehow this cover is too much for me.

11. Zzzzzzzzzz.

12. Agreed. The SON is weird. Why is that there?

13. And what's wrong with that kinda outfit? I LOVE IT! :D

14. Yeah, this cover isn't scary, but that's okay. I think it's really going to fit with the series anyway.

15. LOL there you go again, cracking me up!

16. O_O Those are some serious boobs.

17. I really like this and its simplicity. I hope it is the final cover.

18. Yeah, I think a lot of authors just claim that because of Kindle rankings. They really shouldn't. It means nothing anymore to claim that.

19. What is she even sitting on? This cover makes no sense.

20. It's pretty. Kinda boring.

23. But this doesn't go with the rest of the covers! So no I don't like it. *sad face*

26. It does look like an adult fic cover. But I do like it.

27. ROFL! Your comment is priceless!

30. OMG. That hair. NO. That is not sexy. The beard is even worse.

April 12, 2013 at 9:57 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

5. That guy is not only NOT attractive but is actually a bit creepy looking! I don't like it at all.
13. Okay, goth outift aside, what is wrong with her right hand??? Lol
20. It looks like just her booob is about to spontaneous combust.
21. That is so awkward looking.
38. That really does remind me a lot of Tender Morsels, but it's an amazing cover.

April 12, 2013 at 10:47 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

LOL hahaha... booob

April 12, 2013 at 10:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Christina, I love, love, love your Cover Snark posts! LOL. I burst out laughing every time. Especially this one: "My thoughts: Lost her virginity & Found multiple orgasms." I would've never thought of that cover that way, but now that you've pointed it out... it kinda makes sense. I hate being so blunt, but honestly. There are so many hideous covers out there. It's hard to imagine even the author being all right with such a horrible cover. *scrunches up nose* But apart from that...

LEIGH BARDUGO IS HAVING A NEW BOOK. YES. YES. YES! And that cover is amazing! Tor really outdid themselves this time. Even though the cover with the guy with only his upper lip wearing lipstick makes him look super weird.

April 12, 2013 at 11:17 PM  
Blogger kara-karina@Nocturnal Book Reviews said...

Tor covers officially kick ass! Also, I can't stop looking at the druid dude, I feel jealous of his gorgeous golden hair, and he just feels plain sexy to me *sorry, Christina* I always fancied him :)
Montana Mustangs... I can't even... WTF?
I love redesign for Breath of Iron! The covers for this series went from cheesy to classy in my book.

April 13, 2013 at 6:34 PM  
Blogger Bibliosaurus Text said...

Total agreement on cover of the week! It's gorgeous, intriguing, and different. Plus, I love foxes. I'm planning on naming my future son Fennec.

April 14, 2013 at 10:58 AM  
Blogger Riv said...

Note to self: do not eat cantaloupe when reading Christina's Cover Snark. The risk of death through chocking rises. *cough* Ok I'll go check out the rest of the Cover Snarks now :)

April 17, 2013 at 4:43 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

You totally made me chuckle at Concrete Evidence. Also, Brimstone & Marmalade is a really weird name for a book. And that cover will give me nightmares. Oh and Get The Pole. Srsly?!

April 18, 2013 at 4:41 PM  
Blogger Judith said...

5. This dude has gray eyebrows. WHY would that be attractive unless you're 60 years old?

21. I love love love the title fonts on these books! But the hair in her mouth has got to go.

27. This is a bit too Taylor Lautner movie for me: http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/sites/default/files/2011/06/abduction_poster_embedding.jpg

33. That kid FREAKS ME OUT.

38. This is like Quirrel/Voldemort gone bad. Imagine having a wolf grow out of your head. Hmmm. It's very pretty though!

The Shadow and Bone re-design: I love it - a lot. But the US cover is my one of my all-time favorites. *pats the pretty*

May 4, 2013 at 7:17 AM  

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