A Reader of Fictions

Book Reviews for Just About Every Kind of Book

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Cover Snark (58): Three Weeks in One (Sort Of)

Welcome to Cover Snark, where the people are snarky and the covers quiver in fear. Since I don't write many snarky book reviews here on A Reader of Fictions, Cover Snark is my outlet. If you click on the title of the book, where possible, I've linked to Goodreads. Clicking on the cover itself will show you the cover in a larger size, in most cases. Feel free to love covers I hate and vice versa. Let me know your thoughts in the comments!

I succumbed to popular demand and am trying to get the highlights of the two weeks I missed while I was at BEA, as well as getting the covers from this week. Obviously, I've had to be a bit more particular about what I chose, but I think I've got most of the big reveals, as well as some hilarious ones.

Note: The polls are back, but be warned that the results appear in an external site, so don't vote if you're in the middle of a comment, because you WILL lose it. This is the best of the free polls available for Blogger that I could find, so I can't do anything about this.

Shiny and New:

1. Treasure Hunters - James Patterson & Chris Grabenstein

Thoughts: The fact that James Patterson has a full bookshelf of books at my library in the mystery section with more in general fiction, YA, and Juvenile really distresses me. Also, I always assume that if someone else's name is on it, they wrote it. Talking about the actual cover now, I really doubt it's safe to send kids deep-diving alone like that.

2. Antithesis - Kacey Vanderkarr

Thoughts: This is pretty, but all I can think is RAWR. The reflection makes her look like she has a mane, like a male lion. If you couldn't see it before, try to unsee it.

3. The Waking Engine - David Edison

Thoughts: Ooooh, pretty. This tagline also intrigues me. I want to know more about Voldemort City.

4. Through the Smoke - Brenda Novak

Thoughts: So pretty, but it looks like she went through fire, not smoke. Maybe they took "where there's smoke there's fire" a bit too literally?

5. Spider (Elemental Assassin #10) - Jennifer Estep

Thoughts: You know, women do this head tilted back pose a lot when they're trying to look intense. However, is showing someone you're neck and reducing your vision really an ideal fighting pose?

6. Days of Rakes and Roses (Sons of Sin #1.5) - Anna Campbell

Thoughts: Nights of pepto bismol.

7. The Elites - Natasha Ngan

Thoughts: Oooh, it's like Splintered meets a historical fantasy. Curiosity = piqued.

8. The Fallen (The Enemy #5) - Charlie Higson

Thoughts: This is pretty cool, but I'm not pleased with how inconsistent the covers are through the series. They keep swapping the title and author location. What I do like is that this manages to be both pretty and creepy. The green skulls remind me of this.

9. Tag Along - Tom Ryan

Thoughts: Seems like it would be really difficult to take that series of photos in a camera booth. There's not that time between pictures, so I doubt you could shuffle four people in and out in time. And what's with the purple shirt background?

10. Waterfell (The Aquarathi #1) - Amelie Howard

Thoughts: My initial thought is that this is gorgeous, because I do love the picture-in-picture effect like we're seeing her through ocean blinds. However, her pose...what is up with that? "Don't mind me. I'm just swimming through the ocean while resting my chin on my hand. As one does."

11. Endless Knight (The Arcana Chronicles #2) - Kresley Cole

Thoughts: Kresley Cole's covers are like a combination of Julie Kagawa's and Richelle Mead's. Too bad they both get some terrible covers. Seriously, look at that? Is that supposed to be hot? All I know is that I'm laughing my ass off.

12. The Historians (The Historians #1) - Trisha Leigh

Thoughts: Never dare enter the past without your hipster glasses.

13. Lucky Number Four - Amanda Jason

Thoughts: A searing, introspective novel of relationship dynamics and crotches.

14. Speak Easy (Speak Easy #1) - Melanie Harlow

Thoughts: I do believe you mean "Speakeasy." Also, "I want another cup of coffee!!!"

15. Witch Fall (Witch Song #3) - Amber Argyle

Thoughts: *stares* It's like an underwater Peter Pan or something. Wow.

16. Dawn's Early Light (Ministry of Peculiar Occurrences #3) - Pip Ballantine & Tee Morris

Thoughts: What is on the end of her gun? It looks like a plunger. Also, could we stop putting "First Time in Print" on books that are just publishing for the first time EVER?

17. Steel Lily (The Periodic Series #1) - Megan Curd

Thoughts: I love the textures on this a lot. Also, steampunk that doesn't have people in awkward poses/clothing is a relief.

18. If You Leave (Beautifully Broken #2) - Courtney Cole

Thoughts: Bitch, go ahead and leave. I'll be sleeping.

19. April Showers - Karli Perrin

Thoughts: Sexy fail. The fact that he doesn't appear to have irises freaks me out. Also, I can't help but hear THIS as the soundtrack.

20. Promise of Shadows - Justina Ireland

Thoughts: Love the detail on the feathers and the shade of blue for the title. Not a big fan of how the words are split up, but it's so pretty I can't care that much.

21. Monsters (Ashes Trilogy #3) - Ilsa J. Bick

Thoughts: This looks like it might be cool and creepy. Too bad the largest image of the cover released is this one. Fail.

22. The Sharpest Blade (The Shadow Reader #3) - Sandy Williams

Thoughts: At least if the sharp blade fails her, she has her breasts as backup. She could probably take someone's eye out with those.

23. Love Reborn (Dead Beautiful #3) - Yvonne Woon

Thoughts: Wow, that's some fine photoshop. It really looks like she's in that snowy graveyard in a sleeveless ballgown. The realism is astounding.

24. Dangerous - Shannon Hale

Thoughts: The cover's not really all that interesting, but I love it because ANOTHER SHANNON HALE BOOK AHHHHHHH.

25. Near & Far (Lost & Found #1) - Nicole Williams

Thoughts: Surprise guest snark from Steph of Cuddlebuggery since I wasn't getting anywhere: "Near his penis, far from her panties. I don't care what anyone says, she ins't wearing panties in that pic. They tried to be all clever and cover it up with the black, but they aren't fooling me. Smarter than the average bear, I is. Yoda, I have become." Bahahaha, thanks Steph. This is why I love this girl.

26. Infinite (Incarnate #3) - Jodi Meadows

Thoughts: *snorts* You always know Ana's ready to get down when she puts on her flaming feather eyelashes. Ain't nobody got swag like Ana.

27. Being Sloane Jacobs - Lauren Morrill

Thoughts: I usually hate kissy covers, but this one kind of cracks me up, because he's all mopey with his hands and his pockets, probably because she just made fun of him, and she's all "Don't be sad" cheek kiss. However, I am disappointed that this cover has nothing to do with toe picks.

28. The Meme Plague (Memento Nora #3) - Angie Smibert

Thoughts: Young Johnny Depp is not impressed with your memes or your plagues.

29. Until It Hurts to Stop - Jennifer R. Hubbard

Thoughts: This looks like it should be the third book in Rachel Carter's series, though I guess her hair IS going to the wrong side for that.

30. Closed Doors - Lisa O'Donnell

Thoughts: Sign of good parenting: locking your kid out of the house with sparklers.

31. The Weight of Souls - Bryony Pierce

Thoughts: "Oh, these souls are so heavy. I'll never reach the house."

32. Anne of Green Gables / Anne of Avonlea (Anne of Green Gables #1-2) - L.M. Montgomery

Thoughts: Sourcebooks is doing a redesign of Montgomery's beloved series. While I do think these might be popular with the middle grade set, I definitely prefer the covers of my childhood. THE MEMORIES, y'all. Also, I think these two are way too similar.

33. The Runaway Queen (The Bane Chronicles #2) - Cassandra Clare & Maureen Johnson

Thoughts: My Magnus crush has officially been cured by how nasty his hands are, assuming those are his hands. Certainly doesn't look like a lady's hand, so I doubt it's that queen with itchy feet.

34. The Vampires (In Darkness We Must Abide #5) - Rhiannon Frater

Thoughts: What the eff is she wearing? Say no to feather head!

35. Fracture (Night School #3) - C.J. Daugherty

Thoughts: Gothic building: check. Gorgeous girl: check. Hair blowing in the wind/fan: check. Broken glass so we can understand what fracture means: check.

36. Romancing the Bookworm - Kate Evangelista

Thoughts: Here's how to make readers by your book. Sexy man romancing a reader? Hello, all of our fantasies.

37. Love Like Fireworks - Lauren Melinda

Thoughts: How to make your love like fireworks. Step one: strip down to your undies. Step two: grease up. Step three: Add fire.

38. Darkwalker (Nicholas Lenoir #1) - E. L. Tettensor

Thoughts: Pardon me while I feel nostalgic for the days when men dressed like this. I think I need to go watch some period pieces. Richard Armitage, our time has come again.

39. The Prince of Lies (Night's Masque #3) - Anne Lyle

Thoughts: He looks more like the prince of green lightning. Maybe the lightning is a lie! DUN DUN DUN.

40. Dark Blood (Dark Carpathian #26) - Christine Feehan

Thoughts: 26? Wow. Apparently it's about the epic battle between a fire dragon and a wolf pack, though, so that's cool.

41. Whom the Gods Would Destroy - Brian Hodge

Thoughts: SPACE. I am such a sucker for covers like this. Look how pretty the planets are!

42. Smash Into You - Shelly Crane

Thoughts: If you can look at this cover without hearing Dave Matthews Band, we obviously do not share a brain.

43. Change of Heart - S.E. Edwards

Thoughts: Feel the passion in this awkward lip peck! At least he's being a gentleman and being the one to get sand all up everywhere and letting her be on top.

44. Behind Enemy Lines (Infinity Ring #6) - Jennifer A. Nielsen

Thoughts: Do they make these look so cheesy and fake on purpose? I feel like yes, but WHY?

45. The Shadow Lamp (Bright Lamp #4) - Stephen R. Lawhead

Thoughts: Huh, books by male authors are not usually this purple (and the other version I've seen are pink). Does this mean Cover Flip is having an impact?

46. Darker Days (The Darker Agency #1) - Jus Accardo

Thoughts: Why would you put the blurb between her legs. I have to feel like a bit of a creep to read it.

47. The Grimm Conclusion (A Tale Dark & Grimm #3) - Adam Gidwitz

Thoughts: I'm finding this the least impressive of the series. Perhaps it's the shade of read that's off? The flame hands are neat, though, if not ideally executed.

48. Cry Me a River - Devyn Dawson

Thoughts: All I can hear is THIS. EEEEEEE, bumbumbum bumbumbum bumbumbum bumbumbum BUMMMM

49. Resurrection (Ripper #3) - Amy Carol Reeves

Thoughts: These covers just don't work for me. The girl doesn't look quite real or quite fake, and that freaks me out.

50. Broken (Avena #2) - Marianne Curley

Thoughts: What happened to her face? This is one of the silliest effects for broken or fractured that I've ever seen. Also, not sure white was the best way to go for the background on this one.

51. By Referral Only (Whitman University #2) - Lyla Payne

Thoughts: I wonder if "For a good time call X" falls under the category of "referral."

52. I Heart Band - Michelle Schusterman

Thoughts: Dorktastic. I am a bit confused about how the microscope snuck in with all the band-related things, though.

53. Buried Above Ground - Leah Cypess

Thoughts: Harper, you're learning! It's an ebook cover that doesn't scream "I'M AN EBOOK COVER. PITY MEEEEE!" *pats HarperTeenImpulse designers on the head*

Cover Battles:

1. All Our Yesterdays – Cristin Terrill

UK vs. US: All Our Yesterdays has had several covers already, as the ARC I saw at BEA has yet another cover (purple-y with faces). With this last cover, they've finally got something that works, so I hope they stop here. I like the grey background, and the textures in the stones and sky. The orange in the title and the clock really pops out of that too. My Pick: US.

2. Earthbound (Earthbound #1) – Aprilynne Pike

US vs. German vs. UK: My years of German allow me to tell you that the German title translates to "The Kiss of the Gods," which is intriguingly disparate. Though it's not original, I think I find the UK cover most visually appealing. My Pick: UK.

3. The House of Hades (Heroes of Olympus #4) - Rick Riordan

US vs. UK: These were both revealed in the last week. I am all over the US cover where they look dirty and injured over the UK where they're all clean and calmly holding hands in front of giant flaming dude in helmet. My Pick: US.

4. Revealed (House of Night #11) - P.C. Cast

US vs. UK: Well, the UK is taking that rather literally because she looks pretty naked. Since that one makes me laugh, I like it better. My Pick: UK.

5. Just One Day (Just One Day #1) - Gayle Forman

Hardback vs. Paperback: Another mid-series cover change? Why, Penguin? It looks like they're trying to up the romance appeal, but I don't think that's a great change, since I didn't think Just One Day was really romantic. Also, I really liked the color scheme on the hardback, with the maroon for "day" and in the background as well. Plus, the novel's so focused on Allyson's emotional journey that it makes sense for the cover to be focused on her with everything else a blur in the background. It's not about her walking into the sunset with some guy, who I'm pretty sure was also much taller than her. My Pick: Hardback.

6. Stormdancer (The Lotus Wars #1) - Jay Kristoff

UK Hardback vs. UK Paperback: So we decided to add Yukiko's face to the background of Yukiko slicing? Well, that makes a whole lot of sense. Also, more flowers, red font and Jay's name much larger. It's not like this one is ugly, but the simplicity of the hardback appeals to me much more, and the face really doesn't make sense. My Pick: UK hardback.

7. Rose Under Fire (Code Name Verity #2) - Elizabeth Wein

Canadian vs. US vs. UK: I still really love the Canadian cover. Guys, it's BLUE. I still don't know what's happening in the US cover. The UK one ranks in the middle for me. I might like it more without the girl's face, but it's decent. My Pick: Canadian.

WTF of the Week:

1. My Life as a Lumberjack or How I Fell for the Wrong Guy(s) - Sara V. Olds

Thoughts: I find this almost entirely puzzling. The pink lumberjack shoes. The fact that life as a lumberjack apparently means romance. The pink and green color scheme.

2. 1816 Candles - Amanda Brice

Thoughts: Every single bit of this creeps me out.

3. Irish Kisses - Joanne Kenrick

Thoughts: Hawt.

4. Ruby's Fire (Fireseed #1) - Catherine Stine

Thoughts: In which Barbie falls in love with a muppet bird.

5. Horn Gate (Scratch #1) - Damon Suede

Thoughts: He'll horn your gate.

Though several of these covers are beautiful, none of them swept me off my feet this week, so no Outstanding Cover for these three weeks.

Labels: Cover Snark

23 Comments:

Judith said...: 2. Can't. Unsee. The Mane.

6. The dude looks so manly on this pink/fluff/roses cover. *snorts*

7. I LIKE IT. I want to know what this is about, and she looks pretty badass.

8. The skulls actually remind me more of this: http://tusb.stanford.edu/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/Toy-Story-Aliens.jpg

9. They're ready to break the rules... wearing a purple shirt.

10. I like it, but I think it would have been prettier if you really saw her swimming in the background or something instead of a close-up of her face.

12. This could have been a cute middle grade cover if the girl had been replaced by two children or something. But look, she's a Harry Potter fan! http://cricket2cricket.files.wordpress.com/2011/07/deathly-hallows2.jpg

13. New Girl, a novel.

15. WHOA. I just. Whoa. (Somebody kill the font.)

20. Oooooh this is so pretty!!!

26. I like the feather eyelashes most of all. But the color makes her look sick. I'm not sure that's what they're going for.

27. Aw, so cute! It looks a bit like a Juno book.

28. The meme plague? As in http://static.chilango.com/media/2012/12/24/memes.jpg ?!

33. So we're getting Magnus Bane's body parts one book at a time?

37. Part book, part underwear ad.

47. I hadn't seen these covers because but I actually LOVE them. Silhouettes + creepiness = awesome.

48. I'm crying a river over the font treatment on this book. WHY?!

Cover Battle 3. I just really don't like the UK covers of Rick Riordan's books, even though I have all Percy Jackson books in that edition. The US covers look so much prettier and less video game-ish.

4. ELEVEN BOOKS?! Can't they just stop already?

5. I love the colors on the new paperback (thank god they're not changing the JOY hardback) but it's not at all what the book is about.

6. I don't like faces staring at me like that. Especially when they seem to be floating.

WTF 3. HAWT? No. Just... no.

5. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.; June 6, 2013 at 8:56 AM
Unknown said...: Holy cow that's a lot of titles. You did make up for those missing weeks. :)

I feel like 11 (Endless Knights) are Spike and Buffy wanna-bes.

~Andrea @ Beauty but a Funny Girl; June 6, 2013 at 9:14 AM
Amy said...: 9:16am Start Lol! It's a habit to do that now!

2. Totally looks like a lions mane! That was the first thing I saw.

3. That is a pretty cover!! Sounds really cool too!!

7. I really like that!! I read the synopsis and it sounds cool, but the feelings for the butterfly thing really has a very Splintered feel to it.

12. Who walks like that?! Really? I mean, it's just awkward.

13. Is this like a New Girl in book form? And I think the guy on the right has his hand down his pants. I see a thumb sticking out.

15. Pretty!

18. She's totally fake sleeping.

19. OMG when I saw this cover reveal I thought the same thing about his eye!! It freaks me out!

20. I'm with you on the broken up words, but it is a really pretty cover!!

23. At least it looks like she has boots on.

25. Hahahaha!! Awesome guest snark!!

29. When I saw this cover I thought it was another book in Rachel Carter's series!!

30. Now he's going to burn the house down. That will teach them to lock him out!

33. I just discovered that all the covers go together to make one big picture. I had no clue until like yesterday.

37. That's an awkward pose. They look more like they are trying not to touch than having a sexy moment.

41. Usually something with God in the title would turn me away, but dude... that cover!!

Cover Battles

1. I like the US one better too.

3. US for sure!! That is an awesome cover!

5. I like the original much better.

WTF of the Week

1. I don't get the knife. Wouldn't she have an axe if she was a lumberjack? Of is she not the lumberjack? I don't get it!

2. That's a lot of freaking candles. And dude, that is a creepy cover!! The lady scares me.

4. Getting tattoo's on your arms to match your skirt and belt buckle is totally the in thing to do!

9:49am Damn, that took a while... I'm so happy to have cover snark back though!!; June 6, 2013 at 9:51 AM
Natalie @Natflix&Books said...: I love the cover for Witch Fall and the Waking Engine.
1816 Candles and Ruby's Fire are horrible, but Horn Gate might be one of the worst covers ever. I seriously just snorted. What is that? The more I look at it, the more confused I get.
-Natalie @Natflix&Books; June 6, 2013 at 10:03 AM
GillyB said...: As much as I missed Cover Snark, I miss having your snark IN PERSON more! Oh, well. I'll just read CS now and pretend you're reading it to me, like the creep I am.

2. Lady Mufasa of the Lake.

3. "Gods and mortals... come to die..."

6. SO MUCH PEPTO BISMOL. *flashes of childhood PTSD where the P stands for Pepto*

10. I still think this is beautiful, although the pose is stupid, the eyes are stupid, and the wiggly little tag line is stupid.

11. Endless KNIGHT? WTF is this? And wtf is she about to do? Breastfeed from him?

13. Are your roommates... strippers? This is a home for strippers?

14. That space between Speak and Easy is making me twitch.

19. BAMBI REFERENCE FTW (also her sodding wet hair is gross)

20. PRETTYYYYYYY.

23. *sarcasm alert*

24. "NEEEEEEEAR FAAAAAAAR WHEREEEEEVER YOU ARRRRRRE better be far the fuck away from me. Put on some panties, you foul little guttersnipe."

32. I've certainly seen WORSE Anne covers, so I'm okay with these. BUT YEAH. They're not the ones I grew up with, so obviously they're still wrong.

35. "Broken glass so we can understand was 'fracture' means." OMG.

38. RICHARD ARMITAGE, WHERE ARE YOU?!

43. That is a heinously uncomfortable kiss.

48. JT! GET OUT OF MY HEAD! Actually, on second thought... don't. Take off your shirt and you can stay as long as you like.

53. The HarperTeen Impulse covers really HAVE gotten better.

CB 2: Ooh, I actually like the original US best!

CB 7: CANADIAN FOR SURE.

WTF 1: What. The. Fuck. (Also, is that not purple? Because that is some serious Barney the purple dinosaur color scheme there.

WTF 2: OMG KILL IT KILL IT FAST

WTF 3: HAWT. Also, methinks the leprechaun behind the counter has put a wee bit extra in the drink.

WTF 4: OH JESUS. My first thought was Barbie as well, and... I am lost for words on the bird. ALSO HER NAILS ARE ALL DIFFERENT COLORS

WTF 5: Get your horn out of my gate, please. Also, why does it look like he's doing an interpretive dance in the buff?; June 6, 2013 at 10:27 AM
Ashleigh Paige said...: God damn, I missed Cover Snark!

5. I did that pose last week and fucked up my hip for a few days. True story.

10. She's in Ocean Jail trying to seduce her way free.

11. This cover makes me want to call the police. The guy looks like a less attractive, creepier James Marsters who's thinking about grabbing the poor victimized girl's crotch. She even LOOKS like he's put her through hell. If the female lead in that series is below the age of consent, I'm gonna go get the phone. To call the fiction police. Yeah.

12. I don't plan to read it, but I love the detail of the cover. I also hope she has a face to wear those hipster glasses on, but seeing as she's cut off from the waist up, I have no idea.

14. Quack.

23. I want her dress. NEEEEEEED.

25. God damn it, I hate this author's stuff. I've only ever tried one chapter of it, but it was so mind-blowingly shitty that it's poisoned me against her for life. SHE NEEDS TO BE LESS POPULAR. SHE DOESN'T FUCKIGN DESERVE IT. -leaves to rant elsewhere because this is not the place for my jaded whining-

26. Okay, I'm feeling better now. I love the color and detail on this cover. <3 Definitely my favorite cover in this series even though I'm not a fan of it.

29. Ah, stock images. You're so much fun.

35. -flips off-

37. You make a fine, bloody recipe for fireworks, Christina! I'll make sure to take an umbrella when I go see this fireworks show so I don't end up with someone's ovary, brain, or scrotum on my head after the lovers explode.

39. His pose cracks me the fuck up.

46. At least it's not a phallic government building pointing right up into her spread legs.

49. Girl: "Seriously? You MUST be kidding me." That's exactly what she's thinking.

53. All that's missing is the floating heads from Mistwood and Nightspell, but they can leave the floated heads be. It's fine as it is.

4. I'm so ready for this series to be over so I never have to see the covers again.

5. And the paperback doesn't even have the same look as the already-revealed hardcover! That messed with Usagi something fierce.

6. Floating heads: the death of good covers.

4. WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT BIRD-THING?

5. WHERE THE FUCK IS HIS PENIS?; June 6, 2013 at 10:45 AM
Unknown said...: 2. She really does look like a lion. And why half her face (and mane) is blurry is strange.
3. That cover is admittedly quite awesome. I'm off to Goodreads in hopes it has an equally awesome summary. Boo, no summary yet.
4. If those strange flame additions weren't there this would be very pretty.
9. That is one seriously ugly purple shirt.
11. When I saw this one I totally thought of the ugly guy on The Iron Traitor.
15. That cover is quite impressive. You totally nailed it too. Reminds me a lot of Peter Pan. lol
20. The breaking up words thing is lame but love the overall effect. Would it have been so difficult to make the font smaller? Promise isn't that big of a damn word. And why is the author name so extremely tiny?
33. Dude needs a manicure, pronto.
35. Ohhhhh. THAT'S what fracture means??
41. That is an awesome cover. Totally reminds me of this though. http://www.freecodesource.com/album-cover/51bj072Aq3L/Third-Eye-Blind-Blue.jpg
42. DMB <3
47. For some reason that little boy reminds me of the Insane Clown Posse dude and should be running with a knife. https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQKMi3itL4hCdceL1zbMnPOkEYqyo8Hs8hJDTS4vrBtjkKOWM6bpg
WTF #1: Those are seriously ugly ass shoes.
WTF #4: I think that bird might have a disease.
WTF #5: I don't think he actually has anything to 'horn' you with. He appears to be lacking in that department.

I'm not sure if any of my votes worked. I submitted them all but the page never fully loaded... not sure if it was a problem for anyone else or just me but wanted to let you know.; June 6, 2013 at 12:00 PM
Heather said...: I really like 20 and 21!

27. OMG, THIS IS ABOUT A FIGURE SKATER?! ::starts singing:: "I KNOW WHAT I WANT, AND I WANT IT NOW!" TOEPICK!; June 6, 2013 at 1:09 PM
GillyB said...: I JUST NOTICED THIS but in 46. there is a FACE in the SMOKE and also that pillar is incredibly phallic. Carry on.; June 6, 2013 at 4:34 PM
Katie said...: This might be the only time I didn't agree with a WTF pick. The LUMBERJACK one isn't offensive to me. I mean, it's not awesome. But I don't think it's terrible, not nearly as terrible as the other WTF picks anyway.

I do think that Jennifer Hubbard's cover looks like one of Rachel Carter's, and I totally agree that Lauren's book should have had something with figure skating on the cover. That's like, a lot of the premise, isn't it?; June 6, 2013 at 5:26 PM
Unknown said...: 2. I LOVE the cover of Antithesis (pretty pretty purple!!) but it does have that lion's mane look, haha. Doesn't bother me a lot though.

4. LOL, yeah I'm not feeling this cover a bunch -- the fire make it all look weird.

7. This looks badassssss! Might not not be my thing but still cool. Although the font doesn't go with the rest of the cover, but maybe that is the point?

10. UGH don't like the ocean blinds effect :(

11. Creeper alert!

12. Love this cover - it's very creative!

15. SO PRETTY

19. AHHH HIS EYES!!! What happened there?!?

26. Haven't read this series, and while I always LOVE the color choices, the constant wings and feathers around the girl's eyes drive me crazy/freak me out :/

27. I like the colors and textures on this one. Also MONTREAL - WOOOT CANADA!!

32. I'm a bad Canadian and haven't read the Anne of Green Gables series but maybe I will now because THOSE COVERS ARE ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS!!!!

42. The title of this kinda irks me/grosses me out for some reason.

46. That's a WHOLE lotta Photoshop right there :/; June 6, 2013 at 9:15 PM
Trish Doller said...: WTF4 reminds me of a Sim I once made. It was before I downloaded any custom content, so I had to use the stock hair, eyes, clothes, and jewelry. She drowned when I took the ladder out of the swimming pool.; June 6, 2013 at 10:15 PM
Shelver506 said...: 2. That is... strikingly pretty. *runs to GR*

5. Maybe it's supposed to look cocky? I do that sometimes when I'm feeling pugnacious. Kinda "Come at me, bro."

7. I'M intrigued by the serviceable armor. You go, girl!

10. Ugh, her eyes. Make it stop.

11. The photoshopping is too much for me. Must look away.

12. That's a wee little bridge, yeah?

15. WOW. I don't do witch books, so I won't pick this one up, but... WOW.

16. o_O It looks like she ripped that thing off a Dalek. If so, I'm impressed.

24. DITTO.

29. Oh man. This TITLE is so awful it hurts. Which I guess means they should stop? Or not?

37. Woosh.

38. A man dressed like this? Yes, please.

48. You don't have to say... what you did... I already know... I found out from HIIIIIIM

CB4. I dunno, I'm digging that hood.; June 7, 2013 at 10:10 PM
@MelissaJoLynn_ said...: I haven't laughed this hard in awhile so thank you for never failing to cheer me up with these posts!; June 8, 2013 at 12:12 AM
Amber (Books of Amber) said...: 2. Hahahaha, she does look like a lion!

3. I want this book. Totally judging it by the cover, as you do.

7. I looooooove this cover. I do wonder why her hair is still dry when it's clearly raining, but maybe she's under a giant leaf or something.

10. It looks like she's praying.

11. Ugh. I love the background, but WHAT EVEN are those models doing.

12. Hipster glasses are essential :D

13. I'm enjoying the crotches, not even gonna lie.

13. OHMYGOD I love it!

21. It took me ages to see the guy in the middle of the title. My eyesight is not as it should be.

26. Erm. Okay. O_o

33. That is disgusting.

41. I loooove covers like this as well. Space gets me every time.

CB1. I definitely prefer the US cover, even if it took me a while to figure out that that orange blob is a clock. I'm just slow.

CB3. You can't make me pick! I REFUSE.

CB6. Is this even a question? The HB wins. I generally hate seeing faces on covers, and I don't know why this was necessary.

CB7. I have no idea which one I prefer out of these. Like you said, the Canadian cover is BLUE. But then the face.... Eh. I don't know. I like the font on the UK cover.

WTF1. Okay, I like this one. It's the purple and green, I'm sorry. *runs away*

WTF5. HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.; June 8, 2013 at 6:15 AM
Jaz said...: 2. Weird
3. I like this, it's very original! And picturesque
7. Gorgeous and I love the tagline.
13. ... WTF?!
15. Haunting but I think it's pretty
17. I have a thing for cogs on covers because it makes me think steampunk. So I like.
25. No.
33. I thought they were old lady hands before I realised this is Magnus Bane... aka Godfrey Gao. I am so sad.
36. Love the title change and cover!
37. Oh god they're so buff in a disgusting way.
43. SICK OF THESE NA COVERS GAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *throws through a window*
48. That's a really good JT song.

Cover Battles:
I like BOTH Just One Day covers but I voted for original because that's what I have.

Both Stormdancer covers are pretty, I don't mind either.

WTF of the Week:
#5... what the actual fuck. Seriously.; June 8, 2013 at 7:50 AM
Christina said...: 2. Simba, I am your mother.

8. Hahahaha.

10. Ooh, yes. How about her awesome mermaid tail?

12. Huh, I wonder if that was intentional? If so, awesome.

13. Only without the diversity. JESS AND NICK FOREVER.

15. Yeah, if the font weren't like that, this would have been the week's outstanding cover. SIGH.

26. She does look a bit green. That can't be good.

27. I hope not. I didn't enjoy Juno.

28. Just like that. I imagine.

33. Yup. The dick book should be interesting. O_O

37. It is nice underwear.

47. Really loved the first one.

48. Because this is where bad font goes to die.

3. They do look like bad video games. Hahaha.

4. Apparently 12 is the end? Good lord I hope so.

5. Agreed. I will need the original cover for that.

6. Faces don't float generally. Just the face of Bo maybe.; June 8, 2013 at 12:28 PM
Christina said...: Hahaha, I do see that. Only from the creepy episodes. Sigh.; June 8, 2013 at 12:41 PM
Christina said...: 12. I walk like that when I walk on the kerb. Otherwise, not often. Maybe she's pretending she's a model. Also, where are her shoes?

13. OMG. He does have his hand in his pants! Gross.

23. Good point.

29. Hahahaha, called it!

30. Exactly.

33. OHHHH, so it really will be all of his body parts.

37. In real life, they hate each other. Kind of looks like some workout vid.

WTF1. Lumberjacks might use knives too? I don't really know.

4. BAHAHAHAHA, so lame.; June 8, 2013 at 1:02 PM
Amy said...: 12. Right, who time travels without shoes?! That is a time travel thing right?

13. Dude, I'm sure the other guys he's standing with are wondering why he's doing that right there. I mean, if that's his thing that's cool, but keep it in private!

33. Yeah, On all the sites that have the countdown widget it shows the squares. Cool idea!

37. Haha!! Sexy workouts for those who can't stand each other!! Sexual tension at it's best!!; June 8, 2013 at 1:09 PM
Highland Hussy said...: Between Crash into Me and Cry Me A River, my iPod is getting a 90s workout today ;); June 8, 2013 at 1:14 PM
Christina said...: 12. Yeah, I do believe so.

13. Right. Ain't nobody needs to see that.

33. That is a cool idea. Still don't know why he looks so old and nasty though.

37. Keep those muscles tense. And bend and stretch. And bend and stretch.; June 8, 2013 at 3:27 PM
Tabitha (Pabkins) said...: Super excited to read The Waking Engine and The Elites. What the hell the Waterfell her eyes are all messed up looking...almost like snake eyes.; June 10, 2013 at 1:13 AM

A Reader of Fictions

Book Reviews for Just About Every Kind of Book

: Name: Christina; Location: Norcross, GA, United States

I am a librarian in my twenties. I got my MLIS at the University of Pittsburgh in 2010, and, through the vagaries of the job market, ended up working at a software company, rather than a librarian. I still very much consider myself to be a librarian, though.

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A Reader of Fictions

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Cover Snark (58): Three Weeks in One (Sort Of)

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A Reader of Fictions

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