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A Reader of Fictions: Cover Snark (35): In Which WTF of the Week Loses All Meaning

A Reader of Fictions

Book Reviews for Just About Every Kind of Book

Thursday, December 6, 2012

Cover Snark (35): In Which WTF of the Week Loses All Meaning

Welcome to Cover Snark, where the people are snarky and the covers quiver in fear. Since I don't write many snarky book reviews here on A Reader of Fictions, Cover Snark is my outlet. If you click on the title of the book, where possible, I've linked to Goodreads. Clicking on the cover itself will show you the cover in a larger size, in most cases. Feel free to love covers I hate and vice versa. Let me know your thoughts in the comments!

Commenting pro tip: The easiest way to comment on such a long post is to open the post in two windows (really easy if you use Google Reader). Comment in one and scroll the covers in the other. That's actually how I comment on other people's reviews too. I can't remember all my comments by the time I get to the box!

1. The Summer I Became a Nerd - Leah Rae Miller
Thoughts: Hmmm, Entangled can to better than this. It looks like a self pub, ngl. However, it's vibrant and fun, and one of the best covers you'll be getting this week, so enjoy it.

2. Fanged Princess (Fanged Princess #1) - Elisabeth Wheatley
Thoughts: She looks like Xena. More importantly, WHAT IS SHE HOLDING? A hedgehog?

3. Honey Red - Liz Crowe
Thoughts: In and of itself, the fact that the cover's been designed to look like a beer is pretty awesome, though I'm not a huge fan of the art style. Very meta as well, since the girl on the beer label is drinking the same beer with her on the label.

4. School Spirits (Hex Hall Spin-Off #1)  - Rachel Hawkins
Thoughts: Oh look, a bird. Meh. The Hex Hall covers are a bit too cutesy to rank very high for me, but this fits well with the others.

5. World of Shell and Bone - Adriana Ryan
Thoughts: Pretty, but this girl could use some shells. I mean, if a mermaid's self-conscious about her breasts, then she would find something to cover them besides her arm, right? That cannot make swimming easy. Aside from that, this is pretty lovely.

6. Lady of Pleasure (School of Gallantry #3) - Delilah Marvelle
Thoughts: With the release of these covers, they did something cool, where they shared photos of the photo shoot, then allowed for comparison between the photographs taken and the finished covers. They deepened the red of her dress, made her less pasty white, and gave him better hair. Interesting, no?

7. Night of Pleasure (School of Gallantry) - Delilah Marvelle
Thoughts: More tanning has been done, as well as making her weird underwears into sexy ones.

8. Master of Pleasure (School of Gallantry) - Delilah Marvelle
Thoughts: They were doing so well with these up to now. Ugh. Look at that guy. Gross. Also, sort of looks like she's passed out in his arms, not a willing participant (who would be?!?!). Are they not alone? Why are they both shielding themselves with sheets?

9. Hover (The Taking #2) - Melissa West
Thoughts: Pretty, but a bit of a disappointment compared to the first book. I think what's ruining it for me is how absurd the rocks floating in space look. Plus, the ring around the planet looks like it's shooting from the ornamentation surrounding the title.

10. Deeper We Fall - Chelsea Cameron
Thoughts: Makes me think of this cover, because of the shading and the hands. I'm really just not sure what's happening here and the title font is a bit too ridiculous, but, for this week, it's pretty decent.

11. Fault Line - C. Desir
Thoughts: Who knew a lighter looked so pretty like a sparkler? Simple and lovely. Also, this is an effective tagline.

12. Mortality - Kellie Sheridan
Thoughts: Very good for a self pub, though I suspect this is not a lesbian romance between a zombie and a human, which is what the cover seems to be promising me. I would also like to know what's in the sky: men in a helicopter coming to end them for challenging "family values"?

13. The Neptune Project - Polly Holyoke
Thoughts: Holy cover fail, Batman. What the actual fuck is this? Disney just managed to make dolphins look ugly. That takes some doing, so how about a slow clap for all of the effort they must have put in. That wasn't enough so they threw in some poorly animated children. As always, I find myself stunned that this cover managed to get past so many people without anyone realizing what utter crap it is. Maybe the people responsible for covers really do just sit around drunk all the time?

14. London's Last True Scoundrel - Christina Brooke 
Thoughts: BAHAHAHA. I feel like I'm BUTTing in. Maybe I should leave this one alone.

15. The Girl with the Iron Touch (Steampunk Chronicles #3) - Kady Cross
Thoughts: Well, hello, sassy ginger! She does not look pleased. Maybe because she's been forced into green leather? That can't be comfortable and probably makes rude noises when she walks. Like this.

16. Rising Darkness (Game of Shadows #1) - Thea Harrison
Thoughts: Has that city been taken over by Aragorn's ghost army? That sword also looks a good bit like Sting when orcs are near...

17. Desolate City (Albertos Series #1) - Racquel Jones
Thoughts: With different font treatments and slightly less purple, I would approve of this.

18. Someone to Love - Addison Love
Thoughts: She is SO skinny! Look at her hand; it's basically skeletal. O_O Model, I made you this sandwich. Please eat it. As for the dude...no. This couple clearly bonded over their love of denim and hatred of shirts, the firmest foundation for a relationship.

19. The Nymph's Labyrinth - Danica Waters
Thoughts: Just in case you didn't get what they meant by "labyrinth," they helpfully added a bunch of phallic symbols in the background. You're welcome.

20. The Retribution of Mara Dyer (Mara Dyer #3) - Michelle Hodkin
Thoughts: This appeared on Amazon as the small image for The Evolution of Mara Dyer. Could be a leak of the actual cover, which seems likely given how much like the others it looks. I like it, but changes might be made. Interesting that they appear not to be underwater anymore maybe.

21. Shatter (Delaney's Gift #2) - Amber Garza
Thoughts: Stupid tattoo covers aren't just for men anymore!

 22. The Immortal Circus - A. R. Kahler
Thoughts: BRB. Overcome by a need to go to Cirque du Soleil.

23. A Song for Julia - Charles Sheehan-Miles
Thoughts: Good work, indie press. No idea what age group this cover would be appealing to, though.

24. Walking Away - Adriane Boyd
Thoughts: "Pumbaa: It's times like this my buddy Timon here says: you got to put your behind in your past.
 Timon: No, no, no. Amateur. Lie down before you hurt yourself. It's "You got to put your past behind you."

25. The Henry Sessions (DISARM #4) - June Gray
Thoughts: I suspect something unsavory is going on here. I mean, there's a book and this guy's not reading...

26. The End of Darkness (Offspring #3) - Jaime Rush

Thoughts: I often bemoan the preponderance of musclebound meatheads on romance covers, but this is most definitely not better. I won't even get into the floating face or the tattoo. I can't.

27. Star Cursed (Curse of the Beast #2) - Ashley Lavering
Thoughts: Honey, don't quit your day job. Even the wolf is not impressed. Second week in a row with a star cursed cover for a book called Star Cursed. Maybe it's a sign, guys.

28. Copper Girl (Copper Legacy #1) - Jennifer Allis Provost
Thoughts: Oooh, now that's a cool-looking tattoo. I love how simple and classy this is. The tattoo could be less lame (I'm haunted by birds!), but otherwise I approve.

29. Chloe's Double Draw (King's Bluff, Wyoming) - Fiona Archer
Thoughts: Oh, Siren Publishing, you never fail to entertain me. Of course, the title alone is good for many lols. What you may have missed is the lone book in the bottom right corner. There are so many possibilities implied by this boot.

30. Pride and Prejudice: The Wild and Wanton Edition - Annabella Bloom
Thoughts: Poor Pride & Prejudice. I'm pretty sure this work gets more abuse than any other in literature. The cover's acceptable, though.

31. Ethan (Brightest Kind of Darkness #.5) - P. T. Michelle
Thoughts: You know where self pub covers frequently slay the big six on covers? Novellas. The big 6 don't even try, but this clearly had as much work go into it as the novels did. Yes, I am mostly using this cover as a forum to shame the big publishers for not even trying with their ebooks. I want you to know: we see what you're doing. The forest in the background is pretty enough to make me forgive that tattoo, but not the fact that the author puts both her publishing names on the cover. If you want everyone to know who you are, publish everything under one goddamn name.

32. The Witch's Curse (Legend of the Dreamer #1.1) - David James
Thoughts: Now this self pub does look like what the large publishers do. Well done, though. Much better than A Dance with Darkness.

33. After Eden (After Eden #1) - Helen Douglas
Thoughts: Why? Why are even the covers with big publishers behind them like this? Nothing says charisma like shoving your hands in your pockets. Are pockets protection from the noxious lime green gases floating everywhere? Is there a reason the title's done up in neon? Or for why the publisher decided to put their name on the cover?

34. Dare to Be Dirty (The Dirty Girls Book Club #2) - Savanna Fox
Thoughts: Bahahaha, look what 50 Shades has done to romance covers. Accessories are HAWT now. And dangerous. ;) Apparently, someone's about to lasso a cowboy with a brown belt. Either that's the longest belt in history or someone doesn't understand lassoing. Why the belt is looped into the infinity symbol is something for you to figure out. Enjoy also that this purports to have something to do with a book club. O_O

35. Cryo: Rise of the Immortals - G. Wakeling
Thoughts: This could have been an interesting enough cover, but for some reason they decided to use a fake-looking man with leprosy. I'm pretty sure the idea of being frozen alive is already creepy enough. Those fonts are awful too.

36. Forbidden (Forbidden #1) - J.V.K.
Thoughts: First sign you should run screaming from a self pub? A grammatical error on the freaking cover.

37. Anno Dracula: Johnny Alucard - Kim Newman
Thoughts: Oooh, pretty, though I'm confused as to why NYC is on top of a mountain. Then again, I don't follow the news, so maybe Sandy did this.

38. Soul Avenged (Sons of Wrath #1) - Keri Lake
Thoughts: Flattering that outfit is not. Ditto that title font.

39. Fiery Edge of Steel - Jill Archer
Thoughts: Wow, this is a cool illustrated cover. Can I tell you how much I want that cloak? SO, SO MUCH. I would trade any future children for that cloak. I'll also take the corset while I'm at it. Also awesome? That that fire does not look absurd.

40. Wolf's Touch (Caedmon Wolves #3) - Ambrielle Kirk
Thoughts: No woman could resist his touch. And no half-naked dude, for that matter.

41. Lost in You (Petal, Georgia #2) - Lauren Dane
Thoughts: Steampunk FAIL.

42. Tales from the Clarke (The Human Division #5) - John Scalzi
Thoughts: Science fiction cover designers, did no one tell you that the 90s are over? Take this as your official notice.

43. Saving Mars (Saving Mars #1)  - Cidney Swanson
Thoughts: That blurb makes me want to cry. Anyway, my emotions over pop culture aside, I like the redhead, even if she would surely be dead since she's in space without oxygen.

44. Defying Mars (Saving Mars #2) - Cidney Swanson
Thoughts: Hugging yourself will not keep you from dying in the vacuum of space. Good try, though.

45. Secrets 5 (Secrets #5) - H.M. Ward
Thoughts: Seriously, H.M. Ward writes a new book more often than he/she changes his/her underwear. This is ridiculous. This guy's facial hair looks effed. Yet again, there's an unattributed blurb, meaning that it has been said by no one ever with regards to the books.

46. Tranquility's Grief - Krista D. Hall
Thoughts: That font does not belong on epic fantasy. Not one bit. Because of the placement of the scar and sword, it looks like she just did that to herself.

47. Mindspeak - Heather Sunseri
Thoughts: Having crazy eyes is a prerequisite to mindspeaking.

48. Wolf Spell (Wolf Spell #1) - M.R. Polish
Thoughts: Someone, please take away this designer's access to Photoshop. There are so many things wrong with this that I hardly know where to begin. Maybe with the dog on the left, which fails at being a wolf? Maybe with that the fonts? Or how about the way that chick's hair is floating? Or the fact that these three people have clearly been taken from very different images, and do not belong together at all? Or the four shiny lights? I just. NO.

49. Phantom Eyes (Witch Eyes #3) - Scott Tracey
Thoughts: This series has not been well-treated. Floating eyes are awful to begin with. Add to that the way the eye color has been messed with, the fact that the eyebrows don't match in location or style, and that one of the eyes is sparking and what we have here, ladies and gentlemen, is a hot mess. I DO like the background colors, so that's something at least.

Cover Battles:

1. The Modified (The Biotics Trilogy #1) - C.A. Kunz
First Attempt vs. Retry: YAY! I just love when mocking of a cover makes them go back to the drawing board and do better. Isn't it great when people learn from their mistakes?

2. Antigoddess (Antigoddess #1) - Kendare Blake
Kat Kennedy x3 vs. Tor: Best be preparing yourselves for a rant. I'll give you some time for that while I explain what's going on here. Kat Kennedy of Cuddlebuggery makes some cover alternatives whenever Cuddlebuggery has an exclusive cover reveal, in addition to doing a hilarious interview. Check that out here. Anyway, I don't think I need to tell you, though I will anyway, that Kat will obviously be designing all covers in the future. Her talent is overwhelming. Make sure you click on them to see the larger version for full impact. In all seriousness, I would take any of Kat's covers over the final product, which is simply awful. This looks like a shitty self pub copy of all of the obnoxious feather covers that are coming out these days, particularly with that title font of awful. Why there's a feather on the cover is a mystery, as is the fact that the pristine white feather is bleeding. I think this is supposed to make me curious, but it only makes me want to throw things.

3.  On the Edge (The Edge #1) - Ilona Andrews

Us vs. UK: Even with the awful face-touching issue, the UK cover is something I might pick up, but the US one is awful. I mean, look at that mess. Swirly magic, a red sports car, and a naked, long-haired man floating in the background.

4. Bayou Moon (The Edge #2) - Ilona Andrews
US vs. UK: In spite of the floating man, I like the US one because it kind of looks like that chick is holding a light saber. The force is strong with that one.

5. Fate's Edge (The Edge #3) - Ilona Andrews

US vs. UK: More awkward face touching! PUT YOUR HAND DOWN! I do wish the US would stop with the damn floating man heads though.

6. With All My Soul (Soul Screamers #7) - Rachel Vincent

US vs. UK: While I do actually like what the UK covers have done with the series well enough, I ADORE the US covers for the series. These are THE BEST pretty dress covers.

7. Katie's Hellion - Lizzy Ford
Origina vs. Redesign: Well, I don't love either, but at least the first one had sass, rather than reminding me of mopey Bella Swan.

8. The Mystic Wolves (The Mystic Wolves #1) - Belinda Boring 
 Original vs. Redesign: Ick. I hate their faces. However, the cover is better done, so whatever. Pro tip: if your last name is Boring, get a pseudonym.

9. Angel of Fire - Tanya Anne Crosby
Original vs. Redesign: I cannot even believe I have to admit that I like the 90s romance cover better. What the heck is up with the artwork on this new one. Oof.

Outstanding Cover of the Week:
Fault Line by C. Desir

Learn More:

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34 Comments:

Blogger Bekka @ Pretty Deadly Reviews said...

If The Summer I Became a Nerd is the best I'm getting this week I'm not sure if I want to go on.

December 6, 2012 at 12:49 PM  
Blogger Christina (Christinareadsya) said...

Fanged Girl looks creepy. You're right. WHAT IS SHE HOLDING AND WHY DOES SHE LOOK LIKE SHE'S ABOUT TO AVADA KEDAVRA US. Also, I didn't notice the bird in Rachel Hawkins cover until you mentioned it... and didn't know Kady Cross's third book had been revealed... and I do think that is the cover for Retribution, and that they're still underwater. Mostly because I've seen that artist's work on Society6, and that exact picture :).

December 6, 2012 at 12:52 PM  
Blogger Bekka @ Pretty Deadly Reviews said...

I really love the Honey Red cover. A lot. I love the meta-ness of it.

Wow the School Spirits cover looks like a rip off of Hawkins' covers. Not the best of the series.

That's interesting, about the Lady of Whatever cover, but her breasts are really, really low.

I'm pretty sure that's a lighter on the cover of Fault Line hahahahah, not a gun.

Bahahahahahahahaha the cover of London's Whatever. I SO THOUGHT HE WASN'T WEARING PANTS.

I don't mind the new Kady Cross cover, but it's not the best in the series at all. I still prefer Steel Corset over its sequels.

The new Mara Dyer cover is the best of the series, I think.

I especially love the superimposed boot next to the author's name on Chloe's Double Whatever.

I do like the Anno Dracula cover. But like you, I don't understand the placement of the city.

Soul Avenged is a poor man's Underworld. Model, you are not Kate Beckinsale.

Ugh, I can't anymore. There are too many bad covers this week. TOOO MANNYY.

December 6, 2012 at 1:09 PM  
Blogger KM said...

I'm disappointed with the new Kady Cross cover. I liked the first two in that series (although the girl on the first one looked SO MUCH like Meghan Fox it was uncanny). And I LOVED the second cover. But this one is just sort of...dumb. Not a fan.

December 6, 2012 at 2:11 PM  
Blogger roro said...

i agree w/ the best this week . heck atleast ca kunz book is not that hideous and a bit cool

December 6, 2012 at 3:07 PM  
Blogger Brandy said...

I had higher hopes for The Summer I Became a Nerd cover. :( Here's hoping the contents are better.

WHAT DID THEY DO TO PRIDE AND PREJUDICE???? I just can't...didn't need to know that occurred. Blood pressure just went up.

That Lost in You is supposed to be steampunk!?!

December 6, 2012 at 3:37 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

Well, I DID like the first one best, but now that you pointed out how much she looks like Meghan Fox, I like this one best.

December 6, 2012 at 4:36 PM  
Blogger Rebecca said...

I think that may have been the most fun looking at covers in like forever... You are too funny:)

December 6, 2012 at 6:40 PM  
Blogger Kimberly @ On the Wings of Books said...

1. I love the title, love the synopsis, not loving the cover.

4. The covers for the Hex Hall series are the reason I've never picked them up, this one is the same.

5. Ummmm awkward.

11. Love. Love. Love.

13. For real, I never thought a dolphin could be made ugly.

20. So excited when I saw this because I love it so much and it fits the other covers. I hope this is it (or something very, very similar).

35. This one seriously weirds me out.

CB1. This is a gazillion times better.

CB2. I'm not totally against the real cover, but I love the one that Kat Kennedy did on the far left (the red one).

CB6. Girls in pretty dresses are always better than faces. Always.

December 6, 2012 at 8:04 PM  
Blogger Ashleigh Paige said...

I'm trying so hard to come up with words for some of these covers because most of them really are bad, but the only one I can put words to is After Eden.

WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING, COVER DESIGNER?

Seriously. I want to read that book, but the cover is so awful that it almost made me not want to. The font is awful, the models are awful, someone WAY oversaturated the colors like I do when I'm fucking around--

I had a headache after I first saw that cover because my hand spontaneously slammed into my forehead.

December 6, 2012 at 9:16 PM  
Blogger Stephanie Sinclair said...

1. I really dislike this cover and I was very disappointed with Entangled.

2. She's holding Snarkles or Sonic. Can't decide.

3. Not sure how I feel about that one.

5. Is that book about mermaids? Like a mermaid-dystopia? That sounds awesome. Also, I really like this cover.

6, 7, 8. These are actually romance covers that don't bother me. THIS IS A FIRST! Expect for that last one. That dude...ew.

9. Meh

10. Another meh

11. I really like the cover and the synopsis sounds amazing. I REALLY want this book!

12. Not bad, but I don't particularly care for it.

13. We've discussed this, but I don't understand how this cover was approved. It's so bad. Not even okay. At All.

14. LOL! My first thought was, "Where is his butt crack? How can it possibly be miss- Oh... wait." My eyes just bugged out my head a bit until I realized he was wearing flesh colored pants. Why are they so skin tight? They tricked me for a min.

17. Here we go again with a purple/pink moon thing. Ugh.

20. I've always really like the covers to that series. And I guess if they are out of water then that means he "saved" her or they saved each other?

21. This cover looks like they just asked a random girl to pose in the woods for a photo and then decided to use it for their cover. I don't like it because it doesn't show much effort.

22. I like it!

24. WIN for quoting the Lion King!

26. Oh, ew. And what is he doing with that sword? Just holding it in that awkward position so we will sit back and admire his abs? Uh, no.

27. That font is killing me.

28. Nice!

29. There are too many people on that cover.

31. This is not a bad cover, but I agree that using both names on the cover is a bit excessive.

33. Cover is okay, but I really want this book as well.

34. *Sigh* Why, Fifty Shade? WHY?!

35. This is just all around awful. I'm not sure where they could even remotely fix this.

38. It looks like they tried to imitate Kate Beckinsale's outfit from Underworld. They failed.

39. Very nice!

40. Once again, way too much going on.

41. What the hell... is that a clockwork tat? Bahahahahahaha!

48. Oh dear. I can't even.

49. Ugh. DISLIKE. I like none of the covers in that series.

CB1. OMG. I am so glad they redid that cover. The first was horrid.

CB2. LOL @ Kat Kennedyx3. Hilarious. But I like the cover. :D

CB3. I hate them both.

CB4. US one is slightly better.

CB5. I like the US one much better, but I'm not fond of the floating head thingy either. Make it stop!

CB6. I like both of these covers and have trouble deciding which I like more. A first!

CB7. Oh, I think the redesign is much better. The first one looks like the designer fell asleep at the the keyboard when photoshop was still open.

CB8. I think their faces are okay, but they are a little too perfect looking. The second cover reminds me of Spirit Bound by Richelle Mead.

CB9. I dislike them both.

I agree about the best cover being Fault Line!

December 7, 2012 at 1:09 AM  
Blogger Lilian said...

I am really liking the Anno Dracula cover (I'm a sucker for illustrative covers.) Perhaps if the text was smaller...

Never took Hex Hall's cover seriously. Which explains why I've never even contemplated reading the series.

I saw a blog mention After Eden, and seriously thought it was a self pub.

London's Last True Scoundrel:he has some serious wardobe issues. And his skin is yellowing.

Fault Line: I have no idea why I thought it was a camera the first few times I saw the cover. but pretty!

The Immortal Circus: I thought this one had so much potential. But now it just looks like some chick hanging in a swimsuit. And that boob of hers with the weird shadow is distracting me.

The Retribution of Mara Dyer: I think they are still underwater. I SEE WATER BUBBLES ON THE TOP.

The End of Darkness: Not only is the guy not even close to being handsome, but he has a confused look on his face...an "oh..hmmm..I don't know what I am going to do. slice some monsters maybe? hmmm)
and I have no idea where's he pulling his sword from.

On the other hand, I saw this girl pick up Ready Player One at the library today and thought "girl, I approve of your taste." And then a part of me wanted to pry it out of her hands so I can re-read it (even though I have a copy on my Kindle.)

Lilian @ A Novel Toybox

December 7, 2012 at 8:02 AM  
Blogger April (BooksandWine) said...

Short comment on this but I actually really like that beer cover.

I also LOVE the cover for Anno Dracula, it really appeals to my aesthetic sensibilities.

And yes, the very best cover on here is Fault Line, it really draws the eye and doesn't feel at all 'too much', ya know?

December 7, 2012 at 10:48 AM  
Blogger kimbacaffeinate said...

I love H.M. Meads covers and I liked the side by side photo shoot and finished cover, totally agree some of these covers look like photoshop. Is it really a hedgehog in her hand..that cover bothers me for that reason alone!

December 7, 2012 at 4:09 PM  
Blogger kara-karina@Nocturnal Book Reviews said...

1. I actually quite like this one. Entangled usually does worse than this.
2. not even worth mentioning.
3. LOVE!
4. better than the first trilogy actually, although the bird is awkward.
5. That cover model must be doing well. She is all over the covers. Michelle Zink for example.
12. Wouldn't it have been awesome if it was lesbian zombie drama?!
14. First time I saw this cover, I swear I thought Paul Marron posed naked for this. Alas not happening ;)
15. You also sweet like a pig in that leather. believe me, been there done that. leather trousers withought tights underneath is a big no-no. Feels like sauna.
16. Really like it!
18. what happened to her ribs? Is she Cher's daughter?
19. I'm confused. Columns do not equal labyrinth...
21. I bet she has a great rack but the pose and that godawful dress is killing her.
26. TOTAL FAIL. Who told this guy that he would be a great model?! And that sword. F*cking horrendous! Excuse my French. I hate when they do that shit. There is another cover with a guy with two swords crossed at his naked back with no sheaths for the blades. One of this month's releases? I'm in hysterics every time I see it, because you can't walk like that without nicking your kidney and bleeding to death in process. Utterly ridiculous!
27. The wolf's face says it all :))) Cracking!
33. OMG! Her head is photoshopped to the body. if it doesn't, she is a Frankenstein, and it was attached at this angle.
34. Strangely enough, forget the book, I want that beautiful belt. love old leather!
37. Gorgeous! I'm really thinking of buying the whole series. The covers are so amazing with their vintage red, white and black.
38. Kate Beckinsale she is NOT.
39. That dagger gives me palpitations it's so gorgeous. I wonder if it's Dan Dos Santos work. looks like him.
41. That girl is really pretty, but the flowery bulge distracts and revolts me too much to pick up this book :(
48. I'm just speechless really. It's such an utter FAIL, describing what's wrong with this cover will take way too long.

Antigoddess - you know when I saw that first red cover on Cuddlebuggery, I thought WOW that's gorgeous, and then they showed the real cover. Facepulm. Kendare should have stuck with Nekro's art.
On The Edge Series - Ilona had to do all the UK ebook covers herself, because none of the UK pubs picked up any of her books as ebooks. So Ilona and Gordon publish them, and do their own covers in UK. I think she's done a decent job.

December 7, 2012 at 10:48 PM  
Blogger kara-karina@Nocturnal Book Reviews said...

*sweat* not *sweet*! Just saw the typo :)

December 8, 2012 at 8:00 AM  
Blogger Kayla Beck said...

1. She's a Louisiana girl, so I'll be kind and quiet.

3. I'll allow it.

5. Shell and Bone and Spiderwebs?!

9. There are too many of the same colors to make this easy for me to read. I love purple, but this is teetering dangerously on being pastel.

10. Based on the cover alone, the title should be "Deeper We Fall: Love in the Time of Corpses".

14. David Bowie needs to teach him how to wear tight pants more effectively.

15. I think I may buy this book just because I love the ginger cover so very much. :-D

26. I just guffawed. I thought I'd share.

27. Bestiality.

28. To me, someone just put their tramp stamp in the wrong spot.

33. This cover makes me sad. I still have to buy this book because of my daughter. *sigh*

34. I'm going to take a picture of my cat o' nine tails (gag gift-don't ask) and sell it to a publisher.

37. I like it.

39. YES!

40. *gags*

41. That man has a vagina. The flower proves it.

43. No

44. Nope

47. I do like the freckles.

48. Wait, this isn't the WTF of the week?

49. Ouch.

CB1. About damn time they got a redo right.

CB2. I'll be taking Kat's cover #3 and pretending the current one does not exist. I like Kendare far too much for that.

I couldn't say anything about the other covers. They made me sad. Or I was bored and forgot them. ;-)

December 8, 2012 at 6:05 PM  
Blogger Lynn K. said...

1. The Summer I Became a Nerd - O__O

2. Fanged Princess - The colors remind me Chloe Neill's Charmfall

4. School Spirits - Not a fan of the style but I really like the colors for this one.

5. World of Shell and Bone - Boobs! Immediately thought of Degrees of Wrong's cover the moment I saw it. Turns out they used the exact same photo lol. http://www.goodreads.com/book/photo/13632394-degrees-of-wrong

6/7/8 - Meh

9. Hover - I like this better than the first actually xD And I could have sworn I saw the cover waaay before the cover reveals were posted all over. Was the cover leaked? o.o

12. Mortality - What's going on with their hands???

13. The Neptune Project - EW

14. London's Last True Scoundrel - LOLOLOL! Paul Marron has a nice ass. ;P

22. The Immortal Circus - Very intriguing!

26/27 - Terrible

28. Copper Girl - This one's intrigued me as a thumbnail but when looking at the large version the not so blended in tattoo bugs me.

30. Pride and Prejudice: The Wild and Wanton Edition - Same pic as Samantha Young's ODS cover! Also, I can't help but picture dumplings when I see 'wanton' lol. It's called wanton in my local language. ;p
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_CdF_nh1tEpw/SPtOVtuxkII/AAAAAAAAExw/48JbGy1O8Iw/s400/cooking+baking+201+220-a.JPG

31. Ethan - Now why couldn't this have been the cover for the third book instead? Not sure if they changed designers or something but the cover for Destiny sticks out so much. The color (which I like but doesn't go with the first 2 books) and the bad photoshop job.
http://www.goodreads.com/book/photo/13504881-destiny


32. The Witch's Curse - Really like this one! It reminds me a little of the new Born Wicked series covers.

37. Anno Dracula: Johnny Alucard - Very cool!

41. Lost in You - Very weird. It looks like her hands morphed into this twisty thing and is fondling him.

45. Secrets 5 - Ick. And is it me or are those the same models on the redesigned cover of The Mystic Wolves?

49. Phantom Eyes - I quite like the covers for the series, it makes me want to read them (although I haven't got around to them...)

---------------------------------

COVER BATTLES:

1. The Modified - MUCH better.

2. Antigoddess - I'm REALLY looking forward to this book. But the cover was very disappointing, especially after seeing the gorgeous Anna covers painted by Nekro.

3,4,5 - I like the US covers for this series better than the ones of Kate Daniels (also by Ilona Andrews) but the Kate books are really good! I think it's cool that Ilona designed the covers herself.

6. With All My Soul - Gorgeous dress indeed! I think the UK covers fit the story better but I hate that they had 'for fans of Twilight' or something along those lines slapped onto the girl's forehead in book...3? And the photo is so high quality you could see the pores of the girl's nose on book 6. >.<

7. Katie's Hellion - *squints* Are those 2 the models on Secrets 5 and Mystic Wolves? Lately they seem to be everywhere!

December 11, 2012 at 3:44 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Bahah, it's not best, but it's not close to the worst.

December 11, 2012 at 10:25 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

No idea. Maybe she woke up on the wrong side of the bed with a hedgehog pillow?

Oh, good to know! I like the cover, so I hope it is.

December 11, 2012 at 10:26 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Honey Red is VERY meta.

Well, it's a rip-off of Hawkins' covers for a Hawkins' cover, so I think it's okay.

Bahaha, they are a bit.

Oops. I suck at identifying things.

YUP. That's why it's hilarious.

I agree, but the second one was worst, I though, much as I love that they put an Asian woman on the cover.

agreed on Mara Dyer.

best part.

BAHAHA, she is in no way Kate Beckinsale.

December 11, 2012 at 10:28 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Oh yeah, that cover got a makeover for the better!

December 11, 2012 at 10:41 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

My hopes were much higher as well. :(

Lost in You: I'm not sure, but there are gears superimposed over his chest.

December 11, 2012 at 10:42 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Thanks!

December 11, 2012 at 10:44 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

1. I'm with you.

4. I've picked them up, but never gotten there.

5. Not how I would swim around, for sure.

13. HOW DID THEY DO IT?

20. I think it should be. Great, right?

CB2: I think that's my winner too.

December 11, 2012 at 10:46 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Oh man, so funny that they redesigned and it still sucks so freaking hard. WHY?

December 11, 2012 at 10:47 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

1. Me too. I expected some trappings of nerdiness.

2. So it IS a hedgehog!

5. No clue at all.

8. That dude is SO nasty!

11. Me too. WANT.

13. Seriously, are all of the people who work on cover art drunk/high all the time?

14. I think they're riding pants?

17. Seriously, I've never seen a purple moon irl.

20. Someone told me they know the photograph and they're still underwater, so I guess they're on the ocean floor? I don't even know, but I like the covers for this series too.

21. She almost looks like they walked up on some girl they didn't know and she's about to punch them in the face for taking her picture without asking.

24. I aim to please. :-p

26. If I were going to admire abs, they wouldn't be his.

27. Death by lilac font.

29. That's the point: it's menage amour

33. You think this cover is okay?!?!?!?!

34. You think my belt is sexy?

38. You are not the first person to make that connection. I'm not super familiar with that movie, but, yeah, this looks like that only awful.

41. I don't know, but it deserves a painful death.

49. Same, though I want to read them because it's a glbt paranormal.

CB1: Seriously, good call guys.

CB2: You always like the bad professional covers.

CB7: I don't like the original, but I really hate the new one.

December 11, 2012 at 10:56 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Anno Dracula's nice, but could definitely be better!

Hex Hall: still want to read it, but I might have already if the cover was less cheesy.

After Eden: No kidding.

He has the jaundice!

Fault Line: I didn't know what it was either. O_O

Oh. It's so small I can't see much of anything!

We're better off not knowing where he's pulling that sword from.

YAY! What a good book!

December 11, 2012 at 11:02 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Yup! I like simple covers that are still interesting a lot.

December 11, 2012 at 11:02 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

I don't THINK it's a hedgehog, but I have no idea what it is.

December 11, 2012 at 11:03 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

1. Huh.
5. I am really not good at recognizing cover models.
12. I would read that. Just saying.
14. *doesn't know who that is*
15. That sounds AWFUL. The opposite of sexy right there.
18. No idea. She's scary thin.
19. The labyrinth is her lady bits.
21. That dress is incredibly not flattering.
26. Yup. And this guy really doesn't look like he knows what's happening.
27. The wolf knows what's up.
33. BAHAHA, you are right.
37: I didn't know this was a series. But it does look cool.
38. Universal agreement on her not being Kate Beckinsale.
39. Seriously. GORGEOUS. This was my number 2 pick.
41. Flowery bulge. Look, honey, I got you something!
CB2: Why didn't they get the same people. I just don't get it.
On the Edge: I saw that. They're decent, yeah.

December 11, 2012 at 11:14 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

5. *shrugs*

9. Bahaha, the author name is a bit tricky to read, it's true.

10. Maybe it's about what really happened after Jack sunk at the end of Titanic?

14. Ew.

15. I freaking love gingers too.

33. Your daughter wants this book?

34. *snorts*

CB2: It's such a mess.

December 11, 2012 at 11:26 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

4. The colors are quite nice.

5. Oh wow. I've never seen this one before, but that sure is the same. Why do they think mermaids wear their hair back?

9. No idea. Could you have been looking in a catalog?

12. Black hole?

14. Who is this Paul Marron person?

31. The Destiny cover BLOWS.

45. Maybe?

CB3-5: I've heard the Kate Daniels books are great, despite the covers. I'll try them someday!

6. So awkward when you can see the pores. TOO MUCH.

7. Bahahaha.

December 11, 2012 at 11:37 AM  
Blogger Lynn K. said...

5. So that it doesn't get in the way of swimming? xD

14. A model who's been on almost every genre of adult books lol. I never really noticed him until I saw a post on him then suddenly he seems to be everywhere. o__o
http://www.goodreads.com/shelf/show/paul-marron-cover


Kate Daniels - Please do! It has lots of action, mythology (many kinds, not just the usual Greek ones) and the relationship buildup is fantastic. :D

December 11, 2012 at 10:34 PM  

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