The Horror of Our Love - Ludo

Sad Monsters:
Growling on the Outside, Crying on the Inside

Author: Frank Lesser
Illustrator: Willie Real
Pages: 171
Review Copy Acquired from: Plume

This book consists of forty brief vignettes about various monsters, some of whom are, as the title implies, sad. Not every monster cries himself to sleep at night, though; some quite enjoy their lives of monstrosity. Most of them have romantic problems. It's not easy to be a monster on the prowl in the dating sense, what with also prowling in the nomming sense

It may interest you to know that the author, Frank Lesser, writes for The Colbert Report. This sets some pretty high standards for the book to follow. Thankfully, Sad Monsters was just what I hoped it would be. Puns and irony abound, along with some cute postmodernism (ain't that reevaluation of that monster and his secret pain just precious?).

You get a really wide range of monsters in here. Lesser definitely isn't sticking only to the most popular (zombies, werewolves, vampires). Some of my favorite vignettes were Godzilla wondering what the point of all the stomping is (also, did you know that Godzilla likes M*A*S*H as much as I do?), formerly people-munching diets going vegan or carb-free, peaceful zombies being chased by humans, unsuccessful monsters like Count Macula (who just might work at my office) and Igor's résumé. Pretty much each of the little stories will make you bust out laughing, snort, groan or teehee.

Reading Sad Monsters takes somewhere around an hour. This is an estimate, since I read multiple books at one time; suffice it to say that it is quite short. I feel like this is an excellent book to pull out to amuse your friends with or to buy quirky friends for Christmas (don't know what to get them but know they love Colbert style humor?). Plus, how cute is that monster on the cover!?!

"I'm a killer, cold and wrathful
Silent sleeper, I've been inside your bedroom
I've murdered half the town
left you love notes on their headstones
I'll fill the graveyards until I have you.
Moonlight walking, I smell your softness
carnivorous and lusting to track you down among the pines.
I want you stuffed into my mouth
hold you down and tear you open, live inside you -
love, I'd never hurt you.
But I'll grind against your bones until our marrows mix
I will eat you slowly..."

Silent Sea - KT Tunstall

Siren
Siren, Book 1

Author: Tricia Rayburn
Pages: 344
Publisher: Egmont

Brief Summary:
Vanessa's family travels to Winter Harbor every year for the summer. She and her sister Justine go swimming with the brothers next door, Caleb and Simon. Caleb and Justine have been hot and heavy for the last couple of summers, and Vanessa has always had a bit of a crush on the older, serious Simon. Although afraid of practically everything, Vanessa loves her life, because of her father and her sister, even though she knows her sister is keeping secrets from her. Vanessa never dreamed that her sister's secrets would be so bad that she might commit suicide. She doesn't believe it, so she goes back to Winter Harbor to investigate along with Simon. When more people begin to show up dead in town and the weather goes crazy, they discover that there might be something really serious and dangerous going on in Winter Harbor.

Review:
Although I tend to devour young adult novels like a lion setting on an antelope, I am often disappointed by my reading. For some reason, this does not make me crave the paranormal teen stories any less. You will still see me drooling (not literally, I hope) over the latest novels about vampires, mermaids/sirens, werewolves, fairies, unicorns, etc. I am happy to report that Siren, while not the best of the best, is a good solid read and that I am looking forward to reading the sequel, which is good since my friend brought it back from ALA for me. So yay, the book is not as fail as the cover. That is just terrifying!

Of the various paranormal topics, mermaids/sirens (which area apparently interchangeable?) are definitely among my least favorites. I have read two practically in a row this week, not because I planned it, but just because that's how it happened. I definitely recommend Siren over Lost Voices for those looking for a novel about sirens, although really the sirens are rather different. Rayburn's focus on individual males, rather than taking down whole ships at once. Singing is less important here, replaced by almost a sort of mindspeak with their victims (although they do sing occasionally). Most overtly, these sirens do not seem to have tails of any sort (I can't tell you how much I thought Vanessa was going to walk in on one in the bathtub and see she had a tail like in the movie Splash); they're just women who need to drink salt water and can be underwater for a really long time.

Vanessa made a good main character, with a very human set of weaknesses but the inner strength to overcome them when she really needs to. Simon and Caleb were both great guys in completely different ways. Of course, I would want a Simon for myself; he's just so adorably nerdy sounding. :-)

Siren is a great beach read, although maybe not for those who are easily terrified by literature. You don't want to be afraid to go in the water on your holiday!

"I was happy in my harbor
When you cut me loose
Floating on an ocean
And confused
Winds are whipping waves up
Like sky scrapers
And the harder they hit me
The less I seem to bruise"