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A Reader of Fictions: You're Gonna Go Far, Kid - The Offspring

A Reader of Fictions

Book Reviews for Just About Every Kind of Book

Friday, August 10, 2012

You're Gonna Go Far, Kid - The Offspring

The Loners
Quarantine, Book 1

Author: Lex Thomas
Pages: 416
Publisher: EgmontUSA
Source: EgmontUSA via NetGalley

Description from Goodreads:
It was just another ordinary day at McKinley High—until a massive explosion devastated the school. When loner David Thorpe tried to help his English teacher to safety, the teacher convulsed and died right in front of him. And that was just the beginning.

A year later, McKinley has descended into chaos. All the students are infected with a virus that makes them deadly to adults. The school is under military quarantine. The teachers are gone. Violent gangs have formed based on high school social cliques. Without a gang, you’re as good as dead. And David has no gang. It’s just him and his little brother, Will, against the whole school.

In this frighteningly dark and captivating novel, Lex Thomas locks readers inside a school where kids don’t fight to be popular, they fight to stay alive.


First Sentence: "Someone must have bitten off her nose."

Review:
I've been through a couple of these kids-trapped-in-a-building-without-adult-supervision books already this year, like This Is Not a Test and Monument 14. In theory, I really like that basic structure, because it leaves a lot of space to do interesting things with social dynamics. Here, it was mostly just a way to isolate kids so they can do really awful things to one another.

When I read Monument 14, one of my issues was that none of the kids are particularly likable. Well, compared to the kids in The Loners, I pretty much want to be best friends with everyone from M14. Seriously, there's no one in this book that isn't a RAGING asshole. Even before the apocalyptic scenario, these kids were horrific.

David, the main character, is supposed to garner my sympathy because his mother died and his girlfriend, the hottest piece of ass ever apparently, cheated on him with the guy who took his spot on the football team when he quit. Boohoo, poor Mr. ex-QB. I would have felt badly for him, because both of those things suck, except that, by the time I learn this, he's already commented on how much he wants to sex a couple of different girls. When he finds out about his girlfriend's infidelity, the first thing he does is grab her arm really hard. Not cool. Then he gets drunk and starts a fight. I would hate this guy in real life and I hate him in this book.

His younger brother, Will, seemed like he might be better at first. He should have added some depth to the book, since he has epilepsy, further complicating survival. Unfortunately, his epilepsy was used only for dramatic effect and not to enhance the plot or make a point. Further, Will proves to be driven entirely by sexual urges. Seriously, he has the opportunity to buy useful stuff or to purchase a gold necklace for a girl he's crushing on (that doesn't like him back), and he chooses the necklace. He's so goddamn stupid. Plus, his brother totally had his back and he didn't do anything to help and was generally an ass as thanks. I mean, I don't like David, but Will was even worse.

The women in the book were awful too, every single one of them, which I guess fits nicely with their male counterparts. The kids in the school break down into gangs, two of which are all-female: The Pretty Ones and The Sluts. Yup. Unsurprisingly, girls have limited options in this scenario, so far as I can tell. They can barter sexual favors to a man for safety. They can defend themselves by joining The Sluts, which means they will be called lesbians and fight with the boys, thus get the worst injuries. Besides them, you've got the ugly girls, the ones that don't matter, who exist only to juxtapose their patheticness with that of the others, like Belinda the fat girl. Of course, there's the one girl outside of this, ex-Pretty One Lucy, who, by nature of being a beautiful virgin gets to be protected and survive.

The world building is exceedingly minimal. It exists only to trap the kids in this school. Blah blah virus, blah blah kills adults, blah blah food deliveries every two weeks. Of course, nowhere in the whole paragraph we get explaining why these kids are locked in their school is a reason given for why all of the kids lost their hair when the outbreak happened. Nor do we find out why their hair grows out white.

Anyway, once the first deliveries arrive and they realize the schedule, the kids form gangs, aka cliques based on high school social status. Even in a post-apocalyptic scenario, apparently, hot people do not hang out with uggos. Good to know. Throughout all of this nastiness, the focus upon appearance remains exceedingly important to everyone. Then, of course, they fight about everything.

Seriously, Lord of the Flies has nothing on these kids. They are doing all of this shit for NO REASON. If they don't cause trouble, the government's going to keep giving them supplies. As far as post-apocalyptic worlds go, this really should not be that bad. Unfortunately, this was apparently a school for demon children, so rape, beatings and deaths are going to be fairly common. Basically, everyone fights for stuff like it's the opening off the Hunger Games, where everyone grabs stuff from the cornucopia, only it's like that ALL THE TIME. Really though, the society they've set up here seems more like prison than anything else; they're all serving their terms, but, while they do, they're fighting for position, for sex and for vengeance.

Also, one thing that really bothered me about this? They had SO MANY WEAPONS. For the most part, that's cool. Just like with prison, you can make weapons out of pretty much anything. I get that and accept it. However, at one point, David mentions having a machete. Where the heck did that come from? It's not like you can easily construct a machete like you could a sort of knife or spear. Did that come in the supplies? If yes, that raises other serious questions. If no, was it in someone's locker? This just seemed inaccurate to me.

What I really don't get is why everything would turn into such a ridiculously violent mess. In Monument 14, the kids realized they had enough for everyone and worked together, making everything bearable. Here, the kids have enough food but make the situation impossible because the gangs hoard food. The Loners ends up reading like some sort of Battle Royale scenario where the kids HAVE to kill their classmates in order to survive. The issue here is that no one is forcing them to do this. They just ARE, because they WANT TO.

If you go to dystopias looking for gratuitous violence, The Loners just might be the book for you. The Loners reads like a horror movie, running through the standard tropes and focusing on gore, blood and violence.


Favorite Quote: "Lucy wished she was a Nerd. Best she could tell, they go to hide in the library and read books all day. It sounded wonderful. She wondered if the Nerds organized salons to discuss great fiction or the pertinence of historical events to the present. Were they living out some Chekhov-worthy existence two floors up, musing over philosophy or quantum physics, while the people below them smashed their heads together?"

"No more alibis, mow them down like flies
Hit 'em right between the eyes
Hit 'em right between the eyes
When you walk away
Nothing more to say
See the lightning in your eyes
See 'em running for their lives"

Remember: Every comment on a post during Dystopian August is an entry to win one of fourteen dystopian/post-apocalyptic novels IF you've filled out the form from this post.

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47 Comments:

Blogger Lilian said...

I've seen this cover several times, but I swear this is the first time I saw the two figures in the doorway. A shudder just went through my spine. For such a dark book, the cover makes it look like it's just a dirty workshop in basked in sunlight...

"his girlfriend, the hottest piece of ass ever apparently, cheated on him with the guy who took his spot on the football team when he quit."
When I read this I was thinking, "Oh gosh, really? Only guys come up with this kind of lame stuff" Then I looked at the ame and it was like "Hmmm, Lex...sounds more like a girl's name." Then I looked it up, and it's two guys. No wonder. *sigh*

"The issue here is that no one is forcing them to do this. They just ARE, because they WANT TO."
Sounds like The Hunger Games, except with only the violent freaks from districts one and two.

White hair can actually be pretty bad ass. Just sayin'

Oh, my library actually has 4 copies of this one. But, not interested. This sounds like every cliche dystopia idea thrown into one mess with disgusting characters.

Lilian @ A Novel Toybox

August 10, 2012 at 1:27 AM  
Blogger Alessandra @Out of the Blue said...

Lilian is right! I hadn't noticed the two people in the doorway either.

What can I say... eh. I actually liked this one a lot. I liked David. However, I agree that he looks good only in contrast with Will, and because of his leadership abilities. I'd point you to my review, but honestly, either you connect with a character or you don't.

Really though, the society they've set up here seems more like prison than anything else;
Yep. I think the authors meant it to be this way. I had also assumed that the virus made the students more violent than they normally would; and that the machete and assorted weapons came from the supplies. The authorities don't seem to care too much for the students' survival. It's almost as if they *want* them to focus on killing one another, instead of getting along and maybe find a way out before they are cured.

Too far-fetched? Yeah, probably, in a big-conspiracy kind of way.

August 10, 2012 at 2:10 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

OH SNAP! I've never noticed those figures wither. Creepy!!! Yeah, I don't think the cover's quite right at all. I can't think of a room in a high school that would look like that.

Hahaha, Lex can go other way, because there's Lexie, but also Lex Luthor. Yeah, two guys who both must have been jocks when they were in high school. This is about what badasses they were and how much sex they would get. Pretty much.

Except these are normal kids who were living in a society just like ours until they got shut in the school. Argh.

Right? That's something I didn't take another paragraph to mention. Each gang dyes their hair a different color and only the gangless/The Loners don't. The Sluts dye their hair read with KoolAid, the Pretty Ones dye it yellow with lemon juice, and The Freaks or Skaters, don't remember which, dye their hair blue with TOILET BOWL CLEANER. WHAT THE FREAKING HELL IS THIS? It also pisses me off because some of that was edible, so why did you waste it when food is a commodity. People are dying! Who cares about your damn hair?

Yeah,I would pass were I you.

August 10, 2012 at 10:50 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Yup. Characters are like that. I've loved some that other people hated, like Ashline from Wildefire and Velvet from Velveteen. Maybe if high school hadn't been so awful for me, I would have been less pissed off about his poor little popular guy that's not popular anymore routine. I just could not care about his drama.

Maybe so. That would be a pretty cool twist if you learned that they were like this because of some change to their brain chemistry. Without it, though, it seems a bit over the top. I'll have to read reviews to find out, since I don't plan to read more.

It didn't really seem like David or Will changed much, though, so it's hard for me to say.

Dropping machetes down to them does seem seriously suspect. I wish they'd said WHERE the weapons came from. Would that one little detail mess things up? I feel like the kids would have MENTIONED machetes in the pile, but what do I know.

August 10, 2012 at 10:57 AM  
Blogger aLilLacey said...

K the first sentence made me want to gag. It sound like maybe something i would try to like and read but then stop a third way through because i couldn't handle all the violence and weapons. I've become such a boob about things like that now that i have a little girl.

August 10, 2012 at 2:29 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

If the first sentence makes you uncomfortable, you're going to want to pass on this one, unless you really like gagging, because it gets way worse.

August 10, 2012 at 2:42 PM  
Blogger Adriana said...

Even your reviews of bad books are entertaining. WOW. A machete... "Where the heck did that come from?" I'm silently laughing at all this ridiculousness that is this book.

White hair=Village of the Damned? That's all I can think about when you said white hair.

Did nerds get in the fight? If not I'd be covered.

August 10, 2012 at 3:41 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

Thanks! I do my best. It WAS pretty ridiculous, but readers who just like fighting will love it.

I don't know anything about Village of the Damned, but Google images says yes, only older. The gangs dye their hair though, because that's a good use of supplies.

Sorry, the Nerds DID get in the fight. They had their own gang. They took over the library. No one's above it. There was also a Geeks gang, with the theater kids.

August 10, 2012 at 3:52 PM  
Blogger Adriana said...

Why would hair dye bee in the supplies?

Well taking over the library doesn't sound so bad but if I would have to deal with the potential for bodily harm then maybe I should go hide somewhere or maybe even escape! Did any of them ever think that? I mean you CAN kill adults with a touch right?

August 10, 2012 at 6:12 PM  
Anonymous Audrey (Bibliosaurus Text) said...

I'm about 100 pages in and seriously thinking of giving up. I just can't stand the characters, and the situation seems utterly implausible. They're left alone for a year to just kill each other? What about their parents? Where are the grown ups? I don't get it. This book is stupid. :-)

Also, the whole "Sluts" and "Pretty Ones" thing? I'm over it.

August 10, 2012 at 9:40 PM  
Blogger Lilian said...

I went to the library today and saw it! And those figures were glaring at me. I think it's the only YA book purchased this month thats on the shelf...O_O WHY CAN'T YOU BUY SOMETHING ELSE LIBRARY?

And I also dropped by the bookstore today and saw Throne of Glass. I swear I wanted to just shove it in my purse and run out the door. I basked in the beauty of the first few pages. *o*
TWENTY BUCKS is WAY TOO MUCH FOR A STARVING COLLEGE STUDENT. GO ON SALE DAMMIT.

"Yeah, two guys who both must have been jocks when they were in high school."
Actually, I was watching an interview they did on Youtube and they said their high school lives were "nothing interesting." So I think they went for the most cliche high school over-dramatic plotline in the book. Or they are writing they high school fantasies.

I didn't know you could actualy color hair like that...KoolAid fine, but LEMON JUICE? That thing is barely yellow. and Toilet Bowl Cleaner? I wouldn't expected hair to turn porcelain white.
I guess they thought KoolAid wouldn't be very filling..and Lemon juice would just make your stomach worse with the acidity.

August 11, 2012 at 7:25 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

It wasn't in the supplies per se. I explained in an earlier comment, so I'll copy/paste, since I'm lazy: "Each gang dyes their hair a different color and only the gangless/The Loners don't. The Sluts dye their hair read with KoolAid, the Pretty Ones dye it yellow with lemon juice, and The Freaks or Skaters, don't remember which, dye their hair blue with TOILET BOWL CLEANER. WHAT THE FREAKING HELL IS THIS? It also pisses me off because some of that was edible, so why did you waste it when food is a commodity. People are dying! Who cares about your damn hair?"

Ahem.

They did THINK of escape, but not too seriously for the most part. They seemed to enjoy killing one another too much. Not with a touch, even; they just need to be near the adults.

August 11, 2012 at 11:12 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

It wasn't the worst book I've ever read, but I definitely did not like it and it DOES NOT GET BETTER.

Yeah, I'm not a fan of those names at all. Libba Bray is much better at naming groups.

August 11, 2012 at 11:13 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

WHAT WERE THEY THINKING? Did all the other new books get checked out, except for this one? *snerk*

WHOA. It's 20 bucks? Eesh. Well, maybe you'll win the one I'm giving away?

Highschool fantasy could be it. Although maybe to them all of that wasn't especially interesting...it's just how life was. *shrug*

Yeah, the hair dye thing made me crazy. I DON'T THINK THINGS WORK THIS WAY. AND WHY WOULD ANYONE PUT TOILET BOWL CLEANER ON THEIR HEADS?

August 11, 2012 at 11:16 AM  
Blogger Lilian said...

I hope it's just that all their other new purchases (if there were any) were immediately put on hold because of requests. It would sadden me if I found out they spent their entire August budget on Quarantine.

My library doesn't have a new purchases list or anything (it drives me insane that you can't even sort the online catalog by release date), so you kinda just have to see what's on the "NEW!" shelves. And literally pick up books to check what month they were purchased (except NYT bestselling authors, whose books are usually ordered automatically). I LIKE TO BE THE FIRST BORROWER! and taint that blank page with a date. *o*

"WHOA. It's 20 bucks? Eesh. Well, maybe you'll win the one I'm giving away?"
I think that would have to take a bit of rigging. *wink wink*
Mostly, I just accept it's the book gods way of telling me to stop being so damn greedy and actually read my TBR pile.
I wonder how many emails Rafflecopter gets (why do I always put apostrophes on this word?!?) a day asking for results to be rigged.

"Although maybe to them all of that wasn't especially interesting...it's just how life was."
It just made me think that the guy had crappy girlfriend tastes in the first place.

I would've opted for blueberry jello mix instead. But okay.
THESE PEOPLE ARE CRAZY! and stupid. If I was locked in that school I will probably be in the library reading. Though they probably don't get new book purchases. *sigh*

August 11, 2012 at 4:29 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

That would be really sad, for a number of reasons...

Mine does have a new arrivals section. Books show up on lists when they're ordered. I used to automatically place holds on any that interested me, but I stopped because I couldn't keep up. I also LOVE BEING THE FIRST BORROWER. Oh well.

I'll do what I can... May I recommend sacrifices to the Rafflecopter gods? LOL. That never occurred to me. I wonder if people do that. O_O

Right? She was awful, his ex. Bleh. She cheated on him because he was boring after his mom's death. DUMP HIM THEN. GODDAMN.

Yup. I guess there could have been books in the drops of food? No clue. THEY ARE SO STUPID. Maybe the sane people all died immediately?

August 12, 2012 at 4:49 PM  
Blogger Lilian said...

That would. I don't even know why they still only have one copy of Shadow and Bone but four copies of Quarantine. I saw this 9? year old girl reading Twilight at the library, and she left briefly to go to the bathroom (I guess), and me being a sneaky ninja I kinda wanted to replace her book. I think she got bored after the first few pages though.

What do I sacrifice? burn them lottery tickets?
While I wonder if there's a conspiracy! If I was a particularly greedy and evil Rafflecopter creator...maybe I'd create loophole to fiddle with result so I'd all those Kindle Fire raffles. *rubs hands*

"Maybe the sane people all died immediately?"
I can totally imagine them looking at the ridiculous around them and being like "I can't live on this planet anymore." BANG! or if they don't have any guns...*SLIT*
But I wouldn't do that. I would be sure to read all the library's books first. "Well, since I have no life now...TOLSTOY! HOMER! JOYCE!"

August 12, 2012 at 5:31 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

That would be some awesome ninja-ing! FOUR COPIES OF QUARANTINE? GOODNESS GRACIOUS, WHY?

Be creative. I'd definitely want to win all of the iPads and Kindle Fires. Maybe THAT'S why I've never won one.

No guns. I would have to be killed, because I don't think I'd have the balls to slit. Eeesh. I need to not live in a violent dystopia. *will die so fast and painfully*

LOL. Yup. Finally have time to read all of that...after I read all of the YA.

August 13, 2012 at 7:49 AM  
Blogger Lilian said...

I..I...I DON'T KNOW. Maybe the library got bribed by the publisher with free copies Because really, I can't come up with another reason.

MAYBE! *gasp* I need to work for Rafflecopter. Or maybe too many people swamp those Kindle/Ipad giveaways. *sigh* Though I did win one, so I shouldn't be complaining. You don't need to sacrifice anything to the Rafflecopter gods, you just need to pray to them.

I don't know how movies/books/dramas make slitting so easy. I would be screaming "OWWWWWWWW! AHH!! AHHHHHH!! BLOOOODDD!! AHHH!!"
I don wantto try my hand at the Hunger Games though. Though I suspect I would be dead in ten seconds flat.

I wonder if they have Internet...

August 13, 2012 at 9:44 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Or maybe one of the authors is related to the collection development person? Maybe it got a great review from SLJ or something like that? Doubt it, though.

I can't believe you won one of those for real. Did you enter a lot? Follow all 8000 people, or just get lucky?

Really? I would let someone kill me at the opening. YOU GET NO ENTERTAINMENT FROM ME, PRESIDENT SNOW! FEEL THE VENGEANCE!

Nope. No internet. And their phones only work for pictures and stuff.

August 13, 2012 at 9:52 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

WHICH REMINDS ME. They placed a lot of value on cell phones EVEN THOUGH THEY WERE ONLY GOOD FOR SHARING SEXY PHOTOS! MAKES NO SENSE!

You'd think they'd go for the Renaissance art books instead.

August 13, 2012 at 9:53 AM  
Blogger Lilian said...

I prefer to think they just sent the library free copies.

"You'd think they'd go for the Renaissance art books instead."
No, that would be too tasteful for such idiots who dye hair with toilet bowl cleaner.

"Did you enter a lot? Follow all 8000 people, or just get lucky?"
Actually...no. It was a giveaway from an author's blog tour. It wasn't one of those gigantic blog tours either where you follow/subscribe/like a gazillion people you really don't care for, in fact I think the author organized it herself (hence the fewer entries). I had like 5? entries or so out of 600 total. So odds weren't THAT bad.

And just pray to Rafflecopter gods. I never win those 1000000 entries giveaways though. And I wonder how do they verify entries, if they do.
I HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE SUBMIT RAFFLECOPTER ENTRIES WITHOUT DOING THE TASK! ARRGGGHHH.

I think Snow would be like "oh gosh, that girl was such a pansy that she didn't even try to survive!"

August 13, 2012 at 10:36 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Fair point well made, Miss Cheng.

(I don't know why I wanted to do that, but I did.)

Yeah, the blog tour blasts always have like 50000 entries. O_O Thankfully, I haven't seen as many of those recently. I unfollowed all the blogs that do them.

ME TOO. In pretty much every giveaway, I end up selecting three or four winners before finding someone that's not a lying LIAR FACE.

EFF YOU, SNOW!

August 13, 2012 at 10:40 AM  
Blogger Lilian said...

Why did you use my last name?! It made me think I got myself in some serious deep trouble. Only mean teachers or principals would refer to me like that.

I hate blog tour blasts, they always clog up my email. But I am sometimes tempted and enter them anyway. I am a greedy pig. Which is why I have multiple Twitter accounts, to follow people I don't care about.

I AM NOT A LYING LIAR FACE. I know some people have a blacklist of lying liar faces.

YOU WOULD BE A DISGRACE TO YOUR FAMILY IF YOU DIED LIKE THAT.

August 15, 2012 at 1:41 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Because that's how the phrase goes in 50 Shades, which I actually haven't read. However, I've read so many snarkfests about it that I know such things.

I AM GREEDY TOO. I did notice the multiple twitters.

I should probably make a black list. I MEAN I TOTALLY HAVE ONE NOW. YOU GUYS WON'T WIN.

Who cares? I'm dead anyway.

August 15, 2012 at 8:18 AM  
Blogger Lilian said...

Ditto. Apparently I also know there's a lot of lip biting. And the girl is stupid.
Just like how I haven't read a bunch of classics, but I've read enough literature analysis books/essays/podcasts to make it appear that I do.

"I did notice the multiple twitters."
It's because Twitter has follow limits. I can't follow more than 2000 people. *sigh*

*evil cackle*

"Who cares? I'm dead anyway."
True, true. BUT STILL STOP BEING A PANSY.

On a random note, I went to the bookstore two days ago and I saw a book on the shelves that wasn't supposed to be released until a week later. And I received an early finished copy from the publishers, NOW I CAN'T BE A HIPSTER. HMPH>

August 15, 2012 at 7:07 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

Oh right. It's like Kristen Stewart level lip biting, only someone else is biting her lip for her. I've read a decent amount of classics, I think, but there are many more I need to read. The BBC helps with that a bit too.

Oh, really? Wow. 2000? I am overwhelmed by 300. O_O

What books? How would that make you a hipster?

August 16, 2012 at 4:22 PM  
Blogger Lilian said...

I want to try Dickens again some day. You know I picked up Dickens because of Matlida when I was like 9. DICKENS IS NOT MADE TO BE READ BY NINE YEAR OLDS THAT AREN'T GENIUSES. I learned that the hard way.

Yes, I am used to getting bombarded with tweets I don't read nor care for.

It was The Salt God's Daughter, which is published from a saller publisher...but damn I love the cover to bits. It would make me a hipster since it's release date is on the 21st, so I can stare at it and be like "HA! I GOT IT BEFORE ALL YOU OTHER PEOPLE WHO CAN'T EVEN BUY IT YET!"...but of course it isn't possible since Barnes and Nobles already put it on their shelves. hmph.

August 16, 2012 at 5:24 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

Except A Christmas Carol because it is short. I don't like ACC though. I've only read that and Bleak House, which is good, but it would have been really difficult to get through if I didn't know the plot line from the amazing miniseries.

WHO ARE ALL OF THOSE PEOPLE?

Never heard of it. I'll wait and see what you say!

August 17, 2012 at 8:00 AM  
Blogger Lilian said...

I read A Christmas Carol when I was nine. I didn't like it. I purposely brought it to school to be pretentious and to obliquely hint to my teacher that I was intelligent. Ah, the pain.

I DON'T KNOW! Mostly bloggers? And companies? All ofr the sake of those extra entries.
I need to make another Twitter sooner or later.

Okies! I will try to read it within the next decade or so.

August 18, 2012 at 7:36 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Bahahaha, you would. Even as a tiny kidlet you were pretentious. You'll be hell on wheels when you're old.

Holy cow, girl. That's so much. Do you win tons o' things?

That's how I feel about my piles too.

August 19, 2012 at 11:08 AM  
Blogger Lilian said...

Excuse me? I will take that as a compliment, thank you very much.
In my defense, it was partially the public library's fault I had to be pretentious. Apparently I read the most books in their summer reading program, and then they told my school...and then the school librarian read off all the names. And then we were asked to go up when our names were called so our 8 year old peers could clap for us. Then all of a sudden I felt the need to uphold my status as class bibliophile.

On the plus side, I won a Borders gift card from the summer reading program. I wanted to buy manga, but my dad went and bought books about math claiming that manga was not intelligent (Asian dad!). I did end up reading those books that he bought with my gift card (surprisingly, they weren't too bad), but I was not happy.

I used to have at least one package everyday. Everyday was like Christmas, except even better than Christmas because I don't have to deal with ugly sweaters. I won ridiculous stuff I wouldn't even use like garden gloves (I don't even have a garden), photo filters (I don't have an SLR camera anymore), those melty wax things (I don't even have a Scentsy warmer), stuffed animal clothes (WHUT?!?!), and even a baby pillow...all of which I ended up donating.
It was like I was entering giveaways just so I can experience the joys of opening a present.

But now I'm holding back. "STOP ENTERING THESE RIDICULOUS GIVEAWAYS, YOU DON'T NEED ALL THIS STUFF, LILIAN." But I still have a moderate book giveaway addiction. "OMG, LILIAN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHY ARE YOU ENTERING ALL THESE BOOK GIVEAWAYS FOR BOOKS YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED IN READING? WHAT IN THE WORLD? BOOKS ON GARDENING? YOGA? YOU DON'T DO EITHER OF THOSE THINGS." And I find it ridiculous that I probably spend more time enter giveaways for books I want to read instead of READING (oh the irony!).

August 19, 2012 at 3:52 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

OF COURSE YOU WILL. Better to be pretentious and smart than to be stupid.

Hahaha, OMG. I freaking LOVED Accelerated Reader quizzes. I think I came in second for the number of points and I was so PISSED. I could have read one more book and won. Argh! It haunts me to this day.

What the heck? How dare he choose what to buy with the gift card YOU EARNED? I would have yelled at him forever. HOW DARE HE? Also, why does he judge Asian culture so?

Whoa. That's way too many things. How did you even find that weird stuff?

Right? That's why I scaled back. I went crazy for a while, because I liked getting presents and because I was super jealous of other people's book hauls. I'm a bit better now, though, thankfully. I will laugh forever if you win Glitch.

August 20, 2012 at 8:29 AM  
Blogger Lilian said...

"Argh! It haunts me to this day."
Of only you could hunt the one who beat you down...just like I want to hunt down the bully who stole my juice in recess. YAHHHHH!

Yes, HOW DARE HE.
Then the next time I won a giftcard, I bought New Moon, so maybe that says something about my taste back then.
"Also, why does he judge Asian culture so?"
Judge? My dad doesn't judge. He is Asian culture.
And, he frowns upon the American education system: "you mean you're in 2nd grade and YOU DON'T KNOW MULTIPLICATION TABLES?!? When I was your age in Hong Kong I knew ALL THE MATH!"
So I was drilled fractions and multiplication tables at 7 years old. Then algebra at 10.
Paid off with As later on, but I was crying when I did get how 8 and 7 could make 56.

"I will laugh forever if you win Glitch."
I like to think the books I was meant to read I will get my hands on sooner or later.

August 29, 2012 at 2:06 PM  
Blogger M.A.D. said...

Christina - I LOVE your writing!! *raging assholes* is PERFECT, wish I'd thought of it per my review lol

I do enjoy these *trapped in a building/school/mall* type of stories, but I would've risked having my lungs explode out my nostrils than have spent 5 minutes trapped with these little psychopaths! ;)

August 29, 2012 at 6:35 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

Hahaha, I totally could have stolen his juice. He was totally malnourished looking.

So maybe he was protecting you after all? I totally bought the Twilight books and then had to sell them later, so it happens. To be entirely frank, I do still have my copy of The Host and am kind of excited about the sequel. O_O

Super complex and super simple math make NO SENSE to me. Like, I can memorize the multiplication tables and stuff, but we're all really just accepting on faith that two sevens are 14. Sometimes it boggles my mind how arbitrary it is. I learned multiplication and division in first grade! But then I forgot it when I went to public school and had to relearn in 3rd grade. Oops!

Hahaha. Sometimes you are just meant to read terrible things.

August 30, 2012 at 9:20 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

I do like the basic premise too, but, little faith as I have in humanity, I thought this was unbelievably evil given their circumstances. If all the food they had was what was in cafeteria and lockers, sure. BUT they have a steady supply of plenty of food, so there's NO REASON FOR IT.

August 30, 2012 at 9:28 AM  
Blogger Lilian said...

Must be the image of the stereotypical nerd.

Maybe my dad had very keen book buying foresight? But then again, he has a pile of books in his book cases I saw him order off Amazon...and never read.

Despite my displeasure with Twilight, I still stand by The Host and I thought it was a strong story. I have the paperback on my bookcase (I just won it a few months back) that I am planning to reread before the movie. I remember reading it when it first came out..courtesy of my friend who went out and bought the hardcover on its release. I hope I will still like it on a reread and not find out I just had poor taste back then.
There's a sequel? forreaaalls? O_O

My mom would always quiz me when I was younger. And because I didn't get multiplication tables, I just added them up really fast in the beginning. I got pretty good with that adding business.
Fine, you can say two sevens is fifty nine. Or you can go into binary numbers...

Oh fudge, there's this homeless guy (I think) that's sitting a few meet away from me on campus AND HE IS SNORING SO LOUDLY. HOW DID HE GET IN? IS THIS ALLOWED???

August 30, 2012 at 12:59 PM  
Blogger Lilian said...

Ah! and I suppose I am meant to read horrible books sometimes, how else will I appreciate good books even more? *wink*

August 30, 2012 at 1:00 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

Wah wah. Are any of them good books you could steal? I'm guessing not, or you probably would have squirreled them away.

Yeah, there's going to be more. I think the next one's called The Soul. I remember The Host being really slow for 200 paces, but I liked the heroine and the love interest quite a bit.

Ack. I HATE MATH.

RUN AWAY. Or get some head phones.

August 30, 2012 at 1:35 PM  
Blogger Lilian said...

"you probably would have squirreled them away."
Yes, I would've. But he only likes those self improvement books filled with inspirational stories (think Chicken Soup for the Soul), or motivational sayings. He is REALLY into motivational sayings lately to the point he keeps Googling "quotes" to print out. And one day I found my dad accidently downloaded one of those disgusting "toolbars" from one the web sites he visited. *sigh*
While I am like, "just go to goodreads, daddy! They don't try to make you download a weird toolbar!"
And I am like "just because it's a quotation doesn't make it good, PEOPLE SAY BOGUS THINGS YOU KNOW!"

I just checked on Goodreads, and apparently The Soul is just a placeholder. So I guess I'm afraid to celebrate until a cover/release date is out.
I don't remember the heroine's name nor her love interest. I just remember her traveling through a desert without water and her blacking out. I was so tense at that moment, waiting for her to be saved.

I am ambivalent towards math.

I have ear phones..THEY DIDN'T COVER HIS LOUD SNORES. I wanted to slap him. Or get someone to kick him out. Why can't he sleep on the ground and not save up two chairs?!?! UGH!

August 30, 2012 at 5:08 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

Lol. You have so much work keeping your dad on the straight and narrow. He doesn't love EVERY quote, does he? Goodreads has MANY quotes. I should know; I've added some.

Yup. People got really excited about it when the trailer was released for the movie or the first book or something. Wanderer was the alien, I think. Don't remember the name of the girl whose body she was in. I think the love interest was...Ian? I do not remember that part. I just remember I was mad at the end when Wanderer was put in a new body, which was lame and clutsy and more stereotypical Meyer.

*is uncomfortable with that whole scenario*

August 31, 2012 at 9:39 AM  
Blogger Lilian said...

Godreads is an awesome quotation source...if only it showed up in the top five results on Google when my dad does his quotation scavenger hunt.

I remember seeing the trailer the same day I watched The Hunger Games. I saw it on youtube, then I went in the theater for The Hunger Games...and saw it again!
I can't believe you actually remember their names! Your memory is better than mine!!!

...he is still here! this is at least the fourth time this week! WHAT IS SECURITY DOING???

August 31, 2012 at 1:40 PM  
Blogger Lilian said...

I don't know what's with me and forgetting to commenting about something, then having to make another comment. Blogger needs an edit function.

But mostly I have to fix that stupid "Godreads" typo! GOODREADS! GOODREADS! GOODREADS!

On a slightly more Quarantine related note, I went to the library yesterday I still saw it on the shelves...untouched. lalalalalala

August 31, 2012 at 1:42 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

So he's all about quotationspage, right? I used to spend time on there, because I, too, love quotes.

I'm really surprised too. I can't even remember the names in books I read last week. O_O LITERALLY. I was trying to remember the name of the family with the boat in Blood Red Road and I had to go look in the book. AGH.

Did you TELL security?

BAHAHAHAHA. I hadn't even noticed. GODREADS. It's the Christian fiction only version of Goodreads. *snork*

Take that, slut shamers!

August 31, 2012 at 8:52 PM  
Blogger Lilian said...

He doesn't visit one specific site, he Googles stuff like "quotes on beauty" or "quotes on love" and often ends up on disgustingly designed, sketchy, ad-filled websites from the early nineties that looked like someone just copied and pasted a ton of stuff on there. ugh.

"I was trying to remember the name of the family with the boat in Blood Red Road and I had to go look in the book. AGH."
I hope that wasn't a quiz. Because I have NO IDEA! *hits head on desk*

NO. I AM A WIMP.
And I was thinking that security would hear his thunderous snoring anyway! I have never heard such LOUD snoring in my life. Even earphones couldn't fix it.

AND I THOUGHT YOU WERE SERIOUS FOR A MOMENT BECAUSE IT WOULD BE A PERFECT NAME! so I Googled Godreads, turns out there was no such site. It would've been so fitting! (but maybe Goodreads would sue? I don't know.)

September 1, 2012 at 2:57 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

WOW. What does he DO with the quotes?

Pinch. It was Pinch. Oy. Painful.

Well, it's not like he'll know YOU told security. Besides, DUDE IS PASSED OUT.

WE SHOULD BUY THAT DOMAIN AND MAKE IT HAPPEN. Then we can make money off of the Christians. :-D

September 4, 2012 at 9:18 AM  

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